


Be My Baby

by Jubilee44



Category: Captain America - All Media Types, Dirty Dancing (1987), Marvel Cinematic Universe RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - 1960s, Alternate Universe - Dirty Dancing Fusion, Awkwardness, Ballroom Dancing, Class Differences, Dancing, F/M, Family Issues, First Kiss, First Meetings, Immigration & Emigration, POV First Person, Period-Typical Racism, Period-Typical Sexism, Piano, Racism, Rating May Change, Summer Resort, Summer Vacation
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-19
Updated: 2018-08-14
Packaged: 2019-05-08 21:09:30
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 15
Words: 24,997
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14702364
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jubilee44/pseuds/Jubilee44
Summary: Charlotte goes by Charlie in the summer of 1963. Sebastian works at the resort her family is staying at. He teaches her how to dance.





	1. Be My Baby

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: All work is fiction and in no way associated with any real-life events. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any previously copyrighted material. The original characters and plot are the property of the author of this story. Do not repost, translate, or rework.

_The night we met I knew I needed you so. And if I had the chance I’d never let you go. So won’t you say you love me?_

 

            1963 was the year everyone called me Charlie. It was the summer we spent in the Catskills at the Downey Resort. My father was a doctor and knew the Downey’s. The resort had been in their family for years and catered to New York’s elite families for the summer.

            I wouldn’t know anyone but my father, mother, and older sister. Being the shy eighteen-year-old I was at the time, this was a recipe for disaster. I would be stuck in the mountains surrounded by people I didn’t know.

            I got out of the car and shrunk back as my parents greeted the Downeys. I vaguely recognized Robert and Susan but couldn’t remember the last time I’d seen them.

            “And is this really little Charlie?” Robert looked stunned. “You’ve grown like a weed! I apologize, do you still go by Charlie?”

            “Actually…”

            “Of course she does.” My father put a hand on my shoulder. “She’ll always be our little Charlie.”

            I bit the inside of my cheek and looked for an escape. “Could I freshen up?” I asked my mother.

            “Of course, I’m sure one of the boys could show you and your sister to the cabin.” She nodded.

            “Chris, could you take the girls’ bags and show them to the cabins?” Robert called over a blond boy in shorts and a polo shirt.

            “Yes, sir.”

            “Charlie, dear, why don’t you put on a nice dress for tonight? It’s going to be a fancy dinner.” My mother said before we could leave.

            “Alright.” I nodded reluctantly.

            “Can I take your suitcase?” Chris asked Laurie, my sister.

            She smiled and blushed. “Sure.”

            “Miss?” He looked at me and offered a hand.

            “No thanks,” I said and kept a firm grip on my bag. I didn’t need people carrying my baggage.

           

            After listening to my sister gab on and on about how it was finally the summer she would lose her virginity, dinner time arrived and I was released from her clutches. Of course, she would always be fashionably late so I left without her. I escaped up the dirt road to the main building, a large place that used to be the Downey family mansion before it was converted into the resort after the first war.       The sun was starting to set and small lanterns lit the way up to the building. Crickets started up and I caught glimpses of fireflies over the croquet lawns and golf course. I stopped for a moment, looking over the grassy expanses to the view of the mountains. The sun started to dip behind the Catskills, dyeing the sky a moody purple. I wish I could’ve stayed standing there the rest of the night. But I could hear the music and the conversations of guests. I sighed and continued walking.

 

            “There, you look so much more like a lady.” My mother took my cheeks into her hands. “I wish you would wear more of the dresses I bought you from…” She continued on but I tuned her out.

            I looked around the large dining room. There was a dance floor where some couples were going through the motions of typical ballroom dances. I couldn’t pick out a foxtrot from a waltz so there was no telling what they were doing.

            “Charlie, dear, over here.” My mother brought me back to the conversation as she led me over to a table.

            I sat down next to my father and grimaced at the feeling of the crinoline petticoat against my bare thighs. I knew I would be scratching at it all night, one of the many reasons I didn’t wear dresses.

            “And our little Charlie is planning on going into the Peace Corps.” My father seemed to have been talking about the family before I sat down.

            “Really?” The elderly woman, who I didn’t recognize, looked over at me. “Such a pretty young woman like you? I’m sure you could find a husband and be set for life, dear.” She said.

            I felt like vanishing from the table. I forced a smile. “Well, someone has to help,” I muttered.          

            Laurie arrived and sat down next to me. “Chris is a waiter too.” She whispered in my ear.

            “Who?” I looked confused.

            “Chris, dummy, the one who showed us to the cabin. You have your head in the clouds all the time.” She rolled her eyes. “Look,” she pointed across the dining room to a group of young men dressed in tuxedos. Sure enough, the blond was standing with them.

            “Come talk to him with me,” Laurie begged.

            I looked over at the old woman and then back at my sister. I weighed the scenarios and decided to risk it. “Fine.” I stood up and let her pull me through the sea of tables and people.

            “Hi, Chris.” Laurie batted her eyelashes and feigned shyness.

            I rolled my eyes again because I knew she could talk the ear off of anyone if given the chance. I ignored her and looked around the room again. The hall was filled with mostly older couples, ones who had a lot of money either from business or inheritance or both. Several kids my age were with their families or waiting on tables. I watched the dancers for a bit and then my eyes wandered over to the band on stage.

            I froze when I saw the man playing the piano. He couldn’t have been a few years older than me, maybe Laurie’s age. He had dark hair and gray eyes that focused intently on the keys. His fingers moved fluidly and there wasn’t any sheet music in front of him.

            He glanced up as the song ended. He turned on the piano bench and caught my eyes. He cocked an eyebrow in questioning and a faint smile tugged at his lips.

            I realized I was staring like an idiot. My cheeks burned and I looked away quickly.

            “This is my baby sister, Charlie.” Laurie tugged on my hand. “We’re staying for the summer.”

            Chris smiled. “Nice to meet you too. I should probably get back to work. But I’ll see you around?”

            Laurie nodded eagerly. “Okay!” She yanked me back towards the table. She giggled. “Did you see his blue eyes, Charlie? And the way he looked at me?”

            I tuned out her voice and looked over my shoulder to the stage again. I saw the pianist stand up and say a few words to some of the waiters. They smiled and he left through a back door in the room.

            I sighed under my breath and wondered why I was so caught up in his eyes.


	2. Great Balls of Fire

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Charlie carries a watermelon and blackmails the pianist into teaching her how to dance.

 

            _You shake my nerves and you rattle my brains._

_Goodness gracious great balls of fire._

 

“God, Charlie, you’re so bad at this.”

            I grumbled and tried to aim at the stupid little metal arch again. “This is stupid, I hate croquet.”

            “Mom said we had to spend time together,” Laurie replied.

            “Can’t we do something else?” I protested and wiped sweat from my forehead. It was an unnaturally hot day and even the small task of walking across the lawns made me break out in a sweat.

            “No, now hush.” Laurie put on a sweet smile and leaned against her mallet in a fashionable manner. “Hi, Chris!” She waved.

            The blond turned and smiled at my sister. He almost ran straight into Robert as he was staring at my sister.

            “Christopher, keep your eyes on your work.” He scolded.

            “Yes, sir!” His cheeks went red and he kept walking.

            Robert sighed and walked over to us. “Are you ladies enjoying yourself in the sun?” He asked.

            I was about to say no, but Laurie beat me to answering. How could I forget? I was never the voice of the family.

            “Of course, Mr. Downey.” She grinned.

            “Very good, oh…” He seemed to notice someone down the path. “Sebastian!” He called them over.

            I glanced up and saw his gray eyes again. My heart skipped a beat and I looked down at my appearance. My hair was frizzing from the humidity, I was sweating up a storm, and probably looked unladylike in my shorts, just like my mother always said. I certainly wasn’t my sister who seemed to be fresh as a daisy in the heat, matching all of her clothes and accessories, and had her hair perfectly curled.

            Why was I worried about looks? I never worried about how I looked.

            The pianist, apparently his name was Sebastian, approached us. “Yes, sir?” He was wearing the same shorts and a polo shirt that the other boys were. I supposed he did something other than play the piano at dinner.

            “We should talk about the upcoming dinner,” Robert said. “Girls, have you met our music man?”

            “We haven’t yet.” Sebastian held a hand out to my sister first. “Sebastian.”

            “Laurie, this is my sister, Charlie.” She introduced me. I bit my tongue so I wouldn’t correct her.

            He turned his attention back to me. “Charlie? What’s that short for?” He asked.

            I opened my mouth but my sister spoke over me. “She’s always gone by Charlie. She’s just our baby Charlie.” She cooed in a condescending way.

            “Well, maybe I’ll see you around.” He smiled and started to walk with Robert.

            I felt like screaming. I hadn’t even gotten a word in! “You just…” I huffed and dropped my mallet in frustration.

           

            That night, I decided to skip out on dinner. I was too upset with my family always acting like I was a child. I was eighteen; I was well on my way to being a fully functioning adult. But it seemed like they would never let me out from under their thumbs.

            I decided not to stew in my cabin for the rest of the night. I also didn’t want to be around when my sister returned from dinner. I knew she would just talk my ear off about how Chris looked at her a certain way. I tugged on a sweater because the heat of the afternoon wore off completely and a cool breeze came in through the mountains. I let the screen door slam shut and started to walk the dirt path. I continued past the main building and heard a lot of people leaving dinner and smoking outside. I continued around and saw some of the staff leaving the building from the back. I could only really recognize Chris and noticed he was carrying two large watermelons.

            I rushed over. “Do you need help?” I asked.

            He looked confused. “Uh…I’ve got it.”

            “Are you sure? I don’t mind.”

            He glanced down the path. “Alright, fine. But don’t tell your parents about where we’re going.” He said and let me take one of the watermelons.

            “Okay.” I nodded, unsure of what he was talking about.

            “Your Laurie’s sister, right?” He asked as we walked.

            “Yeah, Charlie.” I reminded him.

            “Right.”

            “My sister likes you,” I said. I wasn’t about to keep her secret when she couldn’t even let me get a word in when Sebastian was around.

            A stupid smile crossed his face. “Really?” He cleared his throat. “Oh uh, oh…that’s nice.”

            I rolled my eyes. “Love is ridiculous. She’s more ridiculous though.” I sighed.

            He chuckled. “You two are sort of opposites, aren’t you?” He asked and walked up the steps to another smaller building.

            “I guess you could say that.” I nodded and carried the cumbersome fruit up the steps.

            Chris nudged open the door and held it for me. I walked in and found myself in a crowded room. There was a small stage where the band from the night before was playing.

            “Uh…” My brain short-circuited for a moment as I looked around. The staff from the resort was all mingling together, drinks in hand. But some of them were dancing. I didn’t know ballroom dancing but I certainly had never seen this kind of dance before. It was unscripted, raw, and inexplicably seductive.

            Chris took the watermelon from my arms. “Thanks.” He said. “You can help yourself to a beer or…are you of age?” He paused.

            “Yeah, yeah…” I nodded. “What are they doing?” I asked like a child.

            He glanced over to where I was looking. “Uh, dancing.”

            I was unsure if I should have been watching. But I was too entranced to look away. I hadn’t even had my first kiss yet, so I was completely green to the idea of sex.

            While I was caught up in the dancers, someone walked over. “Hey, man, what is she doing here?”

            I looked over and saw Sebastian. He had ditched his sports coat and was wearing just the Oxford shirt, a few buttons popped open. My brain was completely on vacation.

            “I carried a watermelon.” I blurted.

            Chris and Sebastian looked at me funny. “Sorry.” Chris nodded to talk to him in private.

            I was mortified with myself. “I carried a watermelon?” I hissed at myself under my breath. “What?!”

            “Can you hand me that beer?” Another boy came over.

            Startled out of my thoughts I jumped. “What?” I looked up at him.

            “The beer? In the cooler?” He pointed behind me.

            I looked down and realized I was standing in front of a cooler. “Oh uh…yeah.” I bent down to hand him the cooler.

            “Thanks.” He smiled. “You don’t look familiar, are you new?” He asked as he popped the bottle open on a nearby table.

            “I don’t work here. I’m visiting with my family.” I explained.

            He smiled. “Oh really? How’d you manage to get into this party?” He asked.

            I was about to repeat my blunder of a statement from before but waited a breath to let my rational thoughts catch up. “I was helping Chris,” I explained.

            “Which Chris?”

            “Oh uh…blond?”

            He laughed good-naturedly. “Doesn’t narrow it down much.”

            I smiled and pointed him out, still talking to Sebastian.

            “Oh, Evans.” He nodded. “He’s a friend of mine. I’m Anthony.” He introduced.

            “Charlie.” I smiled, a little more relaxed. “How’d they learn how to dance like that?” I wondered.

            “Probably in their basements.” Anthony shrugged. “It’s not really something you’ll see in the ballroom here.”    

            “I like it.”

            “Well, if you want to learn, I would ask that guy.” He pointed out Sebastian. “I guess playing the piano means you can dance too.” He shrugged.

            As he spoke, Chris and Sebastian walked back over. “Listen, you won’t say anything to your parents or the Downeys about this, right?” Sebastian asked firmly. He seemed a bit friendlier earlier that day but I realized it was probably because Robert was there.

            “No, I won’t.” I shook my head.

            “Hey, Sebs, she wants to learn how to dance.” Anthony put a hand on my shoulder.

            “Oh, I don’t-”

            “Well they have ballroom classes, Scarlett teaches them. She’s a guest, Anthony, her daddy has enough money to fund her interests.” He crossed his arms over his chest.

            I looked appalled at his scathing remark. “I don’t need my family’s money,” I replied.

            “Right. Well, good luck in the real world, princess.”         

            My jaw nearly fell open. My sister was a princess, I was _not_ a princess. “Excuse you. I’ll have you know-”

            “Look, I’m off the clock. I don’t have to take your whining.”

            “C’mon, Sebastian.” Anthony gave him a look. “Just give her a nice night.”

            Chris nudged Sebastian’s arm. “Be nice.” He warned.

            “Oh, she’ll tell on me?” He raised an eyebrow.

            “Not if you teach me how to dance.” I mimicked his stance and crossed my arms.

            Chris and Anthony snorted, clearly entertained by the interaction. “She’s got you beat, Sebs.”

            Sebastian studied my face to see if I was bluffing. “Fine.” He said gruffly. “One song.”

            I smiled and followed him to the makeshift dance floor.


	3. This Magic Moment

            _And when it happened. It took me by surprise. I knew that you felt it too, by the look in your eyes._

 

            Sebastian faced me and cleared his throat. “I’m sure you’ve taken some ballroom classes…”

            “No.” I interrupted him.

            “Okay…then you won’t need to forget anything.” He stepped closer to me. He put his hands on my hips and I instantly tensed up.

            “Uh…where do I put my hands?”

            He sighed and moved my arms so they were hanging loosely around his neck. “Alright, just try to feel the music.” He started to rock his hips to the beat but met with some resistance. Me.

            I was totally out of my comfortable little bubble that my family kept me in. “So uh…”

            “Jesus Christ, you’re stiff.” He let go of my hips and wiggled my shoulders a little. “Loosen up.” He ordered and looked into my eyes.

            I tried but it seemed to be counterintuitive. The more I looked into his eyes, the more I froze.

            He moved his hands back to my hips and pulled me a little closer. “Don’t think about what other people think. No one else is watching, it’s just you and I right now. Let go.”

            His voice was soothing and I felt a little spark in my mind. Suddenly, I could hear the music and my body responded. I could hardly recognize my own movements, but they felt right.

            A small smile formed on his lips. “There you go.” He started to sway with me. His hands moved to the small of my back and pressed me closer.

            I pressed right against his chest, I could feel the slight stubble from his cheeks, and inhaled his scent. It was intoxicating, a mix of cologne, leather, and nicotine. “You know…smoking’s bad for you.” I blurted. I guess I could find my rhythm but my mouth still had a mind of its own.

            I felt the rumble of his laugh from his chest. “Yeah, life is bad for you.” He replied.

            “Will you teach me how to play the piano?” I asked and looked up at him.

            He rolled his eyes. “I don’t think a summer would be long enough to teach you.”

            I smiled and nodded. “I guess. You’re talented though. At dancing too.”

            He guided me back into a dip and pulled me back up. The brief motion was exhilarating and lost my breath. “Maybe some scales.”

            I laughed and he spun me around. “I could teach you croquet.”

            “It didn’t really look like you knew what you were doing.” His eyes glinted with mischief. “But sure. What else could you teach me?”

            “Uh…” I bit my lip and focused on moving my hips with his. “I don’t know.”

            “You could tell me what Charlie is short for.” He suggested and dipped me back again with the beat of the song.

            “Charlotte,” I answered and felt a mountain of relief. I had finally gotten my name in. None of my family was there to stop me and call me their little baby Charlie.

            “That’s a beautiful name, why don’t you go by that?” He asked and I felt his hand trail back to my hips and down my thigh before returning to the small of my back.

            It made me lose my train of thought again. It was such a simple movement and he hardly even blinked as he did it. But to me, it was unlike anything I’d experienced before. “I uh…” I cleared my throat and shook my head. I kept getting lost in his gray eyes.

            “You didn’t even speak this morning.” He reminded me.

            “My sister has a big mouth,” I replied. I didn’t need a clear mind to say that.

            “You could’ve spoken up.”

            “I was…going to.” I paused as he led me into another spin. “But you walked away.”

            He pressed me flush against him and hitched my thigh up against his hip. “You could’ve called after me. I would’ve listened.” He dipped me back again.

            “Stop doing that!” I accused. “You’re trying to make me lose my thought.”

            He chuckled and grinned. “We could have a conversation off the dance floor.” He reminded me and let go of my leg.

            “Is that allowed?” I wondered as he moved us along with the rhythm. I hadn’t even noticed the song had changed at least twice.

            “It’s a free country, isn’t it?” He raised an eyebrow.

            “My family is really protective over me,” I warned.

            “It’s not like I’m trying to steal your virginity, kiddo.” He smirked.

            He seemed to be amused by how much I was blushing. “I-I am not a kid! I’m eighteen and h-how do you know I’m a virgin? I might not be!” I spluttered.

            “Just by the way you said that.” He replied coolly and his hands slipped away from my hips. “You can move, but you’ve never danced with anyone in your life. You’re a virgin still. Don’t worry, I’m not looking to mess that up for you.” He winked and turned away from me.

            “I uh…” It was like he took my breath with him as he left the party. I stood in the middle of the dance floor, bodies still grinding and swaying around me. My heart ached and I wanted him to come back.

 

           


	4. Mama Said

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Charlie spends the day with her sister and catches glimpses of Sebastian every so often. Then she hears something that breaks the spell. 
> 
> Warnings: Swearing, smoking, usual 60′s sexism, mentions of homophobia, mentions of sex

            _Mama said there’ll be days like this_

_And then she said someone would look at me_

_Like I’m looking at you someday_

_Then I might find out._

           

            When I woke up the next morning, I stayed laying there, staring at the ceiling. For a minute, I thought I had dreamed the whole thing up. The staff party was nothing more than a crazy dream and Sebastian hadn’t actually danced with me. But it was too real. I could still feel his hands on me. I had an active imagination, but it wasn’t that good.

            My sister came out of the small bathroom in the cabin and looked at me. “What are you doing?” She asked.

            “What?” I glanced over at her. “Nothing, I just woke up.”

            “Well, I’m going to the pool, do you want to come?” She offered. She was already throwing a sundress over her bikini.

            “Yeah, okay.” I nodded. I dug through my suitcase and found my swimsuit. I grimaced at the idea of wearing just that at the pool but I decided to suck it up. Most likely, all the boys would be eyeing my sister.

            I put on shorts and a t-shirt, ready to read in the shade by the pool. While my sister could get a glowing tan, I usually burned, despite my use of sunscreen. I grabbed my book, sunglasses, and a baseball cap.

            I followed my sister to the pool as she talked about how I missed the way Chris was looking at her at dinner the night before. I nodded and ‘ohed’ just to placate her.

            “Where were you last night, by the way?” She turned her attention on me as we walked up the path to the main hotel.

            “I wasn’t feeling well, I was in the cabin,” I replied, not meeting her gaze.

            “I went back to the cabin at seven to grab my lipstick, you weren’t there.” She accused.

            “I probably went for a walk then.” I shrugged. “What do you think I would be doing?”

            She seemed to agree with that. I certainly wasn’t the type to be found among a party, dancing with a handsome pianist. I sighed under my breath and something in my chest ached when I replayed the memory of Sebastian leaving me on the dance floor. I didn’t think it would actually hurt.

           

            Laurie and I arrived at the pool where many sunbathers were already setting up for the day. A few kids splashed around the pool and a lifeguard, who I vaguely recognized from the night before, sat by.

            “That’s Jeremy, he’s one of Chris’s friends,” Laurie whispered to me and nodded to the lifeguard.

            “Oh.” I unfurled my towel onto a chair. I made sure I was under an umbrella and sat down, tucking my knees up so I could rest my book against my thighs.

            “Charlie, aren’t you going to catch some sun?” My sister asked. “It’s beautiful out. You’re still so pale.”

            “I will.” I nodded but figured I probably wouldn’t leave my shade.

            Laurie pulled her sundress over her head and flicked her sunglasses over her eyes. She lay down a few feet away from me so she was in full view of the sun. She seemed to realize something and she leaned over to me. She tipped her sunglasses down so I could see her eyes.

            “If Chris walks by, let me know if he looks at me.” She whispered.

            I cringed at the idea of watching out for my sister’s crush but I nodded. “Okay.” I agreed reluctantly.

            She smiled and lay back down. “Maybe we’ll find a nice boy for you here.” She said. “You know, sometimes mom thinks you’re not into boys.”

            “Because I’m focused on bigger things?” I asked as I started to read.

            “I guess, but you also don’t dress up very much. You would be so pretty if you wore makeup too. I could teach you, you know.”

            “No thanks.”

            “Well, just try to be a little more feminine. You know, she’s worried that you’re going to end up like that woman in town. You know, the one who lives with that other woman? There are rumors that…”

            “Laurie, there’s nothing wrong with that.” I interrupted. “It’s their private life, they’re allowed to do whatever they want. This is 1963, not the 1700’s.” I muttered.

            “I guess you’re right.” She didn’t seem to hold any discriminating ideas; she just passed along the gossip like my mother. I wondered if that was just as harmful. “Love is a beautiful thing.” She sighed.

            I rolled my eyes and went back to reading. “Try to have an open mind, Laurs.”

            “I’ll try to be like you.” She smiled slightly. “Equality for all.”

            “Exactly,” I said firmly. “People are so bigoted, I can’t believe it. Did you hear what that woman said at dinner to me? ‘You’re too pretty, blah, blah, blah’.” I mimicked a high-pitched voice. “’Let a man take care of you’.”

            My sister laughed. “Charlie, I don’t think any man or woman would be able to take care of you. You’re too…independent.”

            “I don’t need anyone to take care of me…” My voice faded as I saw Sebastian enter the pool area. Again, he was wearing the same polo shirt and khaki shorts as the rest of the boys. He walked up to Jeremy and said something. They exchanged a few words and a laugh. Sebastian turned and seemed to catch my eye for a moment.

            I panicked and ducked my head so the brim of my ball cap would hide my eyes.

            “Wouldn’t it be nice to have a husband who cared for you?” Laurie asked.

            “I don’t know, maybe,” I muttered, not too focused on the conversation.

            “Well, at least that was a maybe. You don’t want to be an old spinster.”

            I dared to glance up again and caught Sebastian walking out of the gate. I sighed a mix of relief and disappointment. Part of me wanted to march up to him and ask why he just left me the night before, and part of me wanted to never see him again.

 

            As the morning wore on, Laurie got hungry and dragged me up to the hotel to get a snack. I thought I caught another glimpse of Sebastian but I couldn’t be sure. My mind was probably playing tricks on me. We returned to the pool for another two hours but then Laurie got bored. First, we walked to the lake to watch some people sailing, my sister asked around where Chris was. Once she got a definitive answer that he was in the ballroom, she yanked me back up to the main hotel.

            A few elderly couples were taking a dance class led by a blonde woman a little older than Laurie. I realized this was probably the Scarlett that Sebastian had referenced. She was gorgeous, with a slim waist, long legs, and stunning green eyes. I watched for a bit as she taught the couples a through the dance steps. She definitely had a better rhythm than I did.

            Laurie found Chris who was idling around the ballroom area. They talked a bit as I hung around, unsure of what to do. My sister may have annoyed me but she was someone I could follow.

            I caught some movement near Scarlett and I saw Sebastian walking towards her. He said something briefly to her before moving on. I turned, hoping again he wouldn’t see me.

            Once the dance class ended, Chris and Laurie continued talking. I got bored beyond belief and decided to go outside. I wandered towards the back of the hotel again, coming to the building where the party was. It looked very different in broad daylight. The energy was much calmer and less daunting. I heard some people chatting and I glanced around the corner. I saw Sebastian and Scarlett, leaning against the wall smoking. I quickly jumped back so they wouldn’t see me. But I lingered. I wanted to hear what they said.

            “I saw you dancing with that girl last night,” Scarlett said in a deeper voice that was undeniably attractive.

            “Yeah, she’s that doctor’s daughter. The Downey’s know them. The older sister’s been hitting up Chris. He’s totally smitten over her.”

            I stored the knowledge away for later. I was sure my sister would be pleased to know that Chris shared some feelings for her, albeit puppy love, no doubt. I was still curious to hear what he thought about me.

            “So now you’re smitten over the baby of the family?” Scarlett laughed good-naturedly. “Maybe you two will marry and you’ll come into all that money.”

            “Fuck off. She’s just a kid.” He replied.

            “She looks like she’s at least eighteen. You’re can’t be much older than her.”

            “She is eighteen, and that doesn’t matter. She’s so…innocent. I didn’t think there were actually girls like her.” He replied. “I felt guilty by even touching her. I don’t think she’s had a guy within thirty feet of her.”

            “Oh shut up, you act like you’re this rogue manly male who taints all the virgin daughters of guests. You can play bad boy all you want, you still have feelings.”

            I could smell the cigarette smoke and it was making me sick. Of course, it could’ve been from the way he was talking about me too.

            “She’ll find herself a nice, wealthy boy from a nice, wealthy family. They’ll get married, have a boatload of kids, and die. I’m not going to pretend that her future hasn’t already been planned out for her.”

            “She could dance.”

            “Not initially.”

            “But she got into it. I could see the way you two moved. I’m a dance instructor, Sebs.”

            “So what?”

            “So, maybe she’s got a wild side to her. Give her a good summer, make her feel adventurous and reckless. I’m sure she’s just like every one of those suffocated pretty girls. Their families keep them on a tight leash and all they want to do is explore. Fall will come around and she’ll leave.”

            “So, exploit her, that’s what you’re saying?”

            “No, give her a good time. You said it yourself; she probably hasn’t had much experience with guys. Maybe you’ll be her sexual awakening.”

            “I’m not going to fuck her, Scarlett.”

            “That’s not what I said.”

            “Why don’t you give her a good time? Lord knows you like to show girls the other side to love.”

            Scarlett snorted. “As much as I would love to, I don’t think I’ll be her type. I saw the way she looked at you. But if she ever tells you she swings both ways, let me know.”

            “You’re gross sometimes, did you know that?”

            “Sebastian, it’s 1963. I don’t know when I’ll be able to be outward with whom I am. Hell, Anthony doesn’t even get paid as much as we do. This world is a fucking mess. If I have to be a little dirty about how I go about it, then I do. It’s not my fault I have to live in the shadows. Don’t you think I would love to be openly going out with a girl?”

            Sebastian sighed. “Alright, I’m sorry. If I spend more time with her, would that make you happy?”

            “Yes. And if she wants a threesome.”

            “That’s where I draw the line.”

            Scarlett laughed. “I just wanted to see the look on your face. Priceless, may I add.”

            I heard them walking and I backed away. My mind was spinning. Was Sebastian going to…what? What? Play with me? Make me feel special just as a charity case? I ran back to the cabin, totally confused and at odds with myself. Part of me wanted to indulge in whatever he was planning, but part of me wanted to stay strong and independent. I was _not_ some plaything for him.

            “He can try whatever he wants,” I muttered to myself. “I’m not letting him get the satisfaction.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am officially declaring Scarlett as the lesbian friend we all need.


	5. Hey! Baby

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Knowing what Sebastian is planning, she makes it a point to turn down all of his advances, as much as it kills her to do so.

            _When you turned and walked away_

_That’s when I want to say_

_‘C’mon baby, give me a whirl’_

            My stomach churned when I saw Sebastian for the first time after I heard him and Scarlett talking. I had gone over their conversation hundreds of times in my head. I knew he just wanted to pity me and treat me like some innocent baby who had never stepped away from her parents’ arms. And even if I had enjoyed dancing with him, I wasn’t going to let him brag to others about how he made me feel like some wild child.

            He sat at the piano during dinnertime. I didn’t think he caught sight of me so I did my best to keep a low profile. It didn’t help that my sister kept staring at Chris and talking to me every time he glanced her way.

            I decided I’d lost my appetite and stood up. The motion seemed to grab Sebastian’s attention and he looked across the room at me. We locked eyes for a second and I froze. He smiled and I suddenly remembered I needed to avoid him. I just had to forget about his eyes and the way he had smiled at me. Or the way he held me. Or the way he touched me. Or the way he implied I was a bratty princess.

            I huffed and grabbed my sweater off the back of my chair. “I’m sick. I’m going back to the cabin.” I announced tersely to my family. I didn’t wait around for their response. I turned on my heel and left in a hurry. I cursed my unintelligent teenage brain for getting hung up on good looks. I could not and would not allow some boy to mess with my emotions. He had no right to play with me.

            I left the hotel and only made it a few feet down the path before someone grabbed my wrist.

            “Hey, you ran off. I thought you were going to stick around.”

            I turned around and found myself face to face with the person I was trying to forget. “Why would I stick around?”

            “I don’t know. I figured you would come dance again tonight.” He shrugged.

            I pulled my wrist away from him. “I don’t feel like it,” I replied and continued walking.

            “Okay…” He caught up with me. “That’s fine. We could still spend time together though.”

            “I thought you weren’t interested in princesses like me,” I replied coldly.

            “I never said I wasn’t interested in you. And I’m sorry for calling you that. A lot of the guests can be…difficult.”

            I could tell he wasn’t lying and I believed him. Some of them were difficult even to me. “I’d rather be alone,” I said. “I don’t want to keep you away from your job.” I walked down the hill, leaving him.

 

            The next morning, my sister dragged me out of bed to sit out on the beach. My sister stretched out her long legs and smiled. “Isn’t this so relaxing? I’m having such a nice time here.”

            I had a feeling most of her good feelings were from the attention Chris had been giving her. But it was nice to see her in a good mood. “Yeah, it’s beautiful out here.” I agreed. It was nice being cordial with my sister; it made me feel like we were actually transitioning into adulthood.

            “I need to cool off. I’m going to swim to the dock, want to come?” She offered and stood up.

            “Nah, I’ll go out a little later,” I said.

            She took off her sunglasses, leaving them on the towel beside me. I watched her dunk under the water and swim out to the dock floating on the lake.

            “Hey, Charlie.”

            I glanced up from my book to see Anthony. “Oh, hey.” I smiled.

            “Sebastian was looking for you. He wanted to talk to you about something. I’m not sure what.” He shrugged. “Do you want me to go tell him you’re down here?”

            I sighed heavily. “Thanks, but I don’t want to talk to him. In fact, tell him I’m sure whatever he has to say, it’s not important.”

            He laughed. “Alright, girl, I guess it’s your call. Just letting you know, you’re probably the first girl to ever turn him down.”

            “Good, maybe that’ll knock him down a few pegs,” I grumbled.

 

            I thought I had sent a clear message to Sebastian but apparently, I was wrong. After dinner that same day, I walked back to the cabin alone. I bit my tongue when I saw Sebastian standing along the path.

            I opened my mouth to say something but he stopped me. “I’m going to try one more time.”

            “Sebastian…”

            “Look, just come up to the party and dance one song with me.” There was a hint of pleading in his voice. I couldn’t be sure whether it was sincere or not.

            “I don’t feel like dancing anymore.” I crossed my arms over my chest.

            “With me or at all?”

            “I haven’t decided yet. Maybe I’ll find someone else.” I tried to act indifferent. But the way he was dressed in a white button down, the way his eyes seemed to catch every light from the moon, and the proposition to dance was making it hard.

            “C’mon, what’s really going on? I saw the way you were looking at me that night.” He dropped the pathetic pleading.

            “Maybe you need to realize that not every girl is drooling over you!” I snapped. “You’re not some gift to womenkind.”

            “I never said that. I know what I saw and other people saw it too.” He replied firmly. “So either tell me I was wrong or tell me the truth.”

            “I’m not a toy to you!” I blurted out loudly.

            The summer evening air seemed to get chillier. A tense silence held between us as the crickets chirped and the hotel was still faintly audible from up the hill.

            “What are you talking about?” Sebastian finally asked.

            “I heard you and Scarlett talking,” I informed him. The look of realization was everything I needed to see.

            “Look, that wasn’t anything…”

            “How dare you talk about me like that? I am not some ragdoll that’s just begging to be controlled by a man.” I held my ground and tried to stand up straighter so I appeared taller. “I’m going to make my own way in this world and if I want to experience something, I will do it myself!”

            “I wasn’t going to actually…” He sighed and ran a hand through his hair in frustration. “Just listen to me, I know what I said. I guess it was wrong but…”

            “You guess?” I threw my hands up. “So what were you going to do? Were you going to dance with me? Make me feel like I was wanted and like I was pretty? My sister may think that I need attention from a guy but I don’t. I’m not going to let you just paint me a fantasy world. You don’t need to pretend anything, Sebastian. If you think I’m some naïve little girl just leave me be!”

            “You don’t think I wish I could have a girl like you?” Sebastian suddenly burst out angrily. “You don’t think I would want someone who’s beautiful and sweet? Someone who…who is respectful but speaks her mind? Here’s the thing, Charlie, you haven’t seen the real world yet. And you don’t know that people like me and people like you; we don’t end up happily ever after together. You’ll go on to live your nice, quiet life in some suburb. Me? I’m going to have to work my ass off just to scrape by. I’m going to have to deal with shit just because I wasn’t born into a family like yours!”

            I froze. I didn’t mind him yelling but I was taken aback by how strongly he felt. “You…you never said any of that before.” My voice got quieter. “You treated me like I was some…spoiled girl who you didn’t want to be near.”

            “That’s not how I feel.” He lowered his voice too. “But I live in reality. Even if I did think you were a nice person, I would have no chance with you.”

            “Why not? I don’t care that you work here.”

            “It’s not about where I work. I know for a fact your dad would not want you bringing me home.” His eyes fell to the ground and his shoulders tensed up.

            “My father would like you. You play the piano and you seem well spoken. I don’t know why he wouldn’t…”

            “I don’t think he would want his daughter dating an immigrant who can barely support his mother, let alone himself.”

            “I didn’t know…” My mind was spinning. Everything I had assumed about Sebastian was wrong. And I figured that everything he had assumed about me wasn’t right either.

            “Yeah, I have to make it seem that way. I’m lucky because I can hide it. I can get rid of my accent and act just like every other American. I think if I didn’t I’d be treated a lot different.” He grimaced and his jaw tightened. “Look, Charlie, you don’t have to do anything. It was stupid of me to even consider what Scarlett suggested. I guess I got caught up in the idea of having this summer fling with a girl like you.” He shook his head.

            “Sebastian…” I took a step towards him. My heart was racing and I wasn’t exactly sure what I was doing. “If you really want to get to know me then you can. I don’t care where you came from, how much money you have, or any of that. It doesn’t matter what my family or anyone else at this resort thinks. But you need to be doing it because you want to, not because I’m some prize.”

            “Charlie, you’re no one’s prize. That’s been made clear to me even in a few days.” He smiled slightly. “You’re definitely different than the other girls I’ve met.”

            “Because I’m not flinging myself at your feet?” I raised an eyebrow at him.

            He chuckled and threw his hands in his pockets. “Alright, I get it. You want this thing to be real.”

            “Sure.” I nodded and wrapped my arms around myself. “If you don’t want to spend time with me then don’t. It’s that simple.”

            “Okay, deal. Will you come dance with me now?” He asked hopefully.

            “Do you want to dance with me?”

            “I’ve never had a dance partner like you, so…yes.”


	6. Can't Take My Eyes Off You

            _Pardon the way that I stare._

_There’s nothing else to compare._

_The sight of you makes me weak._

_There are no words left to speak._

“Where are you from?”

            “Originally?”

            I nodded and rested a hand on his shoulder as he pulled me close.

            “Romania.”

            For the first time, I heard his accent coming through in his voice. I smiled slightly because I liked the way it suited him. “So, part of the USSR.”

            He nodded. “My mom and I just barely escaped. We weren’t allowed to leave unless the government granted it. But she managed to get us smuggled across to Switzerland. Then we went to London, and then came here.”

            “I couldn’t imagine going through that, leaving your home behind and being in danger like that.” I murmured.

            He looked a little surprised. “Most people don’t really think about what we went through. They usually wonder if America is better and how much I most love the USA.” He smiled slightly. “I can appreciate the patriotism, but it’s strange.” He shrugged. “Then there are those who believe immigrants shouldn’t be allowed in or granted asylum.” He swayed us slowly along with the song. His hand pressed into the small of my back, his other hand holding mine. It felt more intimate than the first time we danced. I guess it was because of the conversation we had had just moments before.

            “That’s ridiculous,” I grumbled. “Some people in this world are so small minded.”

            “You never seemed like you were.” He said and spun me around. “There are certain people that seem open-minded. It’s usually the quieter people.”

            I smiled and shrugged shyly. “Why do you think so?”

            “Because you don’t talk over everyone. You actually listen.”

            “Hm…I guess.”

            He didn’t say anything after me. I realized he hadn’t taken his eyes off of me. Embarrassed, I ducked my head and stared at my feet.

            He moved his hand from my back to my chin so he could tilt my face up. “Never look at your feet when you’re dancing.” He said just loud enough to hear him over the music.

            “Why?”

            “Because you can’t move correctly and you’re not connected with your partner.”

            “Have you had a lot of girlfriends?” I asked out of the blue.

            He raised an eyebrow at me as he moved his hand back to original position. “Why are you asking that?”

            “I dunno. You just seem like you would have the attention of a lot of girls.”

            “I bet you have the attention of a lot of guys.” He retorted. “How many boyfriends have you had?”

            My cheeks reddened. “Uh…I’m sure I don’t. They’re too busy flirting with my sister.”

            “I wasn’t looking at your sister, I was looking at you.”

            My heart skipped a beat in my chest. “Why…I uh…” My eyes went back to my feet.

            “Charlotte.”

            He took my breath away when he used my full name. No one used my actual name. But I’m sure if they did, it wouldn’t sound nearly as nice as it did when he said it.

            “Eyes up.” He reminded me.

            My face had gone completely red but I looked up at him anyways. “You like making me blush.” I accused.

            He chuckled. “Maybe.” He dipped me back and pulled me up quickly, flush against his body. “You’re cute when you’re blushing.”

            “Stop…” I rolled my eyes.

            “C’mon.” He let go of my hand and wrapped an arm around my waist once the song ended. “Let’s go somewhere quieter.”

            I wasn’t sure what he was planning on doing but the way he said the words made my stomach turn. I wasn’t nervous, so much as I was excited. I followed him through the crowd of dancers and out of the staff building.

            “It’s hard to talk in there.” He explained as we walked down the steps and back onto the path. Night had fallen completely and the usual sounds of the summer evening were in the air.

            “You want to talk more?”

            “Well…I guess we have a lot of time to talk.” He shrugged. “But it feels like I don’t have enough time if that makes sense.”

            I nodded and walked close to his side, his arm reeling me in towards him. “I could understand that. You don’t exactly seem real to me.” I admitted.

            He laughed. “I’m just an imaginary friend?” He teased.

            “Maybe.” I giggled and shook my head.

            “Or maybe it’s sort of like a coincidence that we met? We’ve been looking for someone like each other.”

            “So fate?”

            “If you believe in fate.”

            “I’m not sure.”

            We walked slowly, as if the second we arrived at my cabin, the relationship would end. I wasn’t yet confident that I was what Sebastian wanted. I wasn’t convinced that he was right for me either. But my usual shyness and hesitation were being pushed to the side. Something else had awoken and was telling me to go for it.

            “So, you’ve never had a boyfriend?” He brought up the same conversation from inside.      

            “No.” I shook my head. “I guess I was too busy in school. Most of my friends weren’t very good at studying because they were too busy with their boyfriends.”

            “Why am I not surprised that you’re a bookworm?” He smirked.

            “Learning isn’t a terrible thing. It’s probably what makes me open-minded.” I pointed out.

            “That’s true.” He smiled and kicked a few stones along the path. “I dunno, I probably couldn’t keep up with a girl like you.”

            “I don’t think I could keep up with a guy like you,” I replied quietly. “You know more about the world than I do.”

            “So we’ll teach each other things.” He shrugged. “Like this.” He stopped and turned to face me. He gently took my face in his hands, his thumbs grazing over my cheekbone, and his palm against my jaw. His eyes studied mine and I forgot how to breathe.

            He smiled slightly. “You’re so tense.” He whispered.

            “I’ve never been kissed before,” I told him.

            “Damn shame. Well, if you want to wait around for the perfect guy, you can.” His hands slowly started to draw away from me.

            “You can’t just build me up like that and then drop it. I want to kiss you.” I grabbed his shirt and brought his lips to mine.

            I could feel him smiling. It was awkward for a minute, I couldn’t figure out how to move my lips or where to put my hands. But it soon became a natural sensation. It was like he was guiding me through every little touch. He left one hand on my cheek; the other moved my hand up to the nape of his neck. This way, he could pull me closer. His fingers grazed down my arm, my side, and finally to the small of my back just like we were dancing again.

            I tilted my head to the side and felt my anxiety about touching him float away. He was warm and his arms felt like home.

            I gently pulled away for a breath and looked up at him. I wasn’t sure how I was going to keep my hands off him now. It was like he had opened up a new gateway for me and I was going to explore every inch of him.

            My cheeks went red at the thought. _He’s patronizing you. He felt bad you’ve never kissed anyone._

            “Sure that was your first time?” He grinned.

            I laughed shyly. “Yeah…I didn’t think it would be that good.”

            “Now you’re just flattering me.” He murmured and drew me back in. The second time around, he deepened the kiss. In a skillful way, he parted my lips and traced the tip of his tongue over my bottom lip.

            The motion made me weak in the knees and I knotted my fingers in his hair for some support.

            A few voices cut through the haze I was in. I instantly recognized one of them as my sister and I panicked. I pulled away from Sebastian and shoved him into the thicket of trees we were standing by.

            “Charlie?” My sister squinted a little bit to see me.

            “Yeah?” I could see she was walking with Chris.

            “What are you doing out here? I thought you weren’t feeling well?” She questioned.

            “Just getting some fresh air.” I lied and tried to keep my eyes away from the spot where I had unceremoniously pushed Sebastian.

            “Okay…” My sister looked suspicious. “Well, mom and dad will be down soon. Chris and I are going to walk around a little.” She gave me a subtle look of excitement.

            “Yeah, cool. I’ll be in bed probably.” I rocked back and forth on my heels, anxious for her to leave.

            “Alright… don’t stay out long you’ll get bitten by mosquitos.” She continued on walking with Chris.

            I waited until they were out of sight before telling Sebastian the coast was clear.

            “Jesus Christ, you’re stronger than you look.” He rubbed the back of his neck with a wince.

            “Sorry, I panicked,” I explained and brushed a few leaves off his shoulders and picked some out of his hair.

            He shrugged. “S’okay. You should probably get to bed though. I have to too. I’m working early.”

            “Can we spend time together tomorrow?” I wondered shyly.

            “Maybe during my breaks. But we’ll have to be careful. I’m not technically supposed to be fraternizing with any of the guests. Neither is Chris but he’s too head over heels to care much.”

            “You aren’t?” I teased half-heartedly.

            He let out a short chuckle. “You’re worth the risk, but I can’t lose this job.” He explained.

            I nodded. “I know…I understand completely.” I didn’t want him to think I was some spoiled brat. “Well, goodnight.”

            Sebastian smiled and tilted his head to kiss me softly one more time. “Goodnight.” He murmured as he pulled away. His eyes locked on mine for a moment. “Come see me tomorrow, or ask Scarlett where I am.”

            “I will.” I walked up the steps to the cabin and lingered by the door, watching him. He glanced back at me as he started walking away. He gave a short wave and a lovesick smile.

            My heart was close to melting as I went into the cabin and flopped onto my bed. I stared up at the ceiling and grabbed my pillow to cover my squeals of happiness.


	7. Get Ready

            _I never met a girl who makes me feel the way that you do._

 

 

           The next morning, I had to pinch myself to remember that the kiss with Sebastian was real. I glanced over and realized my sister was already out for the day. I jumped up quickly and got dressed. I actually took a moment to fix my unruly curls and grabbed my sister’s mascara to apply a few swipes.

            I swung the cabin door open with a new sense of confidence. So much so, that I didn’t realize someone was standing by the cabin.

            “In a rush to see someone?”

            I nearly fell down the stairs when I heard Sebastian taunt me. I glared and carefully made my way down without falling. “You can’t scare me like that.”

            He chuckled and glanced around. When he deemed the coast to be clear, he wrapped an arm around my waist so he could kiss me.

            Instantly, I could taste nicotine on his lips. It was sour but oddly intoxicating. I wondered if it was because he was the one kissing me. “I thought I told you, smoking’s bad for you,” I said when we pulled away.

            He winced. “Habits are hard to break.” He tugged me to his side as we started to walk up the path.

            “I mean do you even know what’s in them?”

            “Nope, I’d rather not know.”

            I frowned. “Ignorance is not bliss.”

            He smiled and shook his head. “Depends on the situation.”

           

            The rest of the day, I spent some time with my family but kept my eye on the clock. I wanted to make sure I was around for Sebastian’s breaks. Every so often he’d walk by and send a wink my way. I blush and try to keep listening to my sister.

 

            “Chris said we could do something together on his day off,” Laurie said as she whacked the birdie back over to my side of the badminton net.

            I groaned as I tried to reach it in time. I nearly fell on my face trying to extend my racquet out. But the birdie fell flat and I had to pick it up and serve again. “What are you going to do?” I asked. I didn’t mind talking to Laurie about Chris. Now that I could see her point of view of being head over heels, her delusions sort of made sense. I only wished I could talk to her about my relationship and get some advice.

            “Maybe he’ll kiss me.” Laurie squealed as she hit the birdie back over. “Do you think he’ll kiss me?”

            I almost stumbled over my feet trying to return the lob. I cursed under my breath when I came up short again. “I don’t know, Laurs, maybe.” I shrugged and served. “He seems to really like you.”

            She smiled. “You know, Charlie, you’re in a much better mood today.”

            “I guess I’m just starting to like it here.” I let a smile play on my lips as I thought of Sebastian. 

            “Hi, dad, hi, mom.” Laurie waved to my parents as they walked by with their golf bags.

            “Look at you two getting along.” My father remarked. "I think this vacation was one of the best ideas for this family." He said proudly. "My two girls are actually being friendly.

            “Dad, do you have the time?” I asked.

            “Sure, Charlie-Bear.” He pushed his sleeve up to glance at his watch. “It’s almost noon.”

            “Okay, thanks. Laurie, I’ve gotta go, I’ll be back.” I promised and dropped my racquet.

            “What?” Laurie pouted. “But I was winning!”

            “We’ll pick up where we left off,” I said and started to make my way back to the hotel.

             I walked behind the main building and Sebastian fell into step with me. “You’re not very good at badminton either.”

            I rolled my eyes and nudged him. “I’m good at dancing.” I reminded him, which he chuckled and nodded. “Do you have your lunch break now?” I asked.

            “Yep, half an hour.” He wrapped an arm around me. “C’mon,” He led me up a set of stairs to a smaller building.

            “What’s in here?” I asked as he peeked in the window.

            “Dance studio. Scarlett gives private lessons here.” He answered. “It’s empty now.” He checked the door and it was unlocked. “Alright, I want to teach you some ballroom dancing.”

            “Really?” I looked surprised.

            “Sure, it might be fun.” He turned the lights on and found a stereo in the corner.

            “Where did you learn to dance?”

            “Scarlett will teach me a step every so often just for the fun of it.”

            “Okay then, what’s my first lesson?” I shifted my weight back and forth between my feet.

            Sebastian turned on some music that sounded a lot like the type he played at dinners. He walked over to me. “Stand up straight.” He put his hands on my shoulders. “Stand with confidence.” Then he tilted my chin up. “Eyes always on me.”

            “How will I know where I’m stepping?” I was a little skeptical.

            “Trust that I’ll lead you.” He smiled. “Okay, so when I step back, you step forward. But don’t go until two.”

            “What?” I was beyond confused.

            “Just try, ready? One…”

            Purely on instinct, and still confused, I lurched forward and stepped on Sebastian’s foot.

            “Two…” He winched. “Never step on one.”

            “Sorry. Are you okay?” I asked, feeling terrible.

            “I’m fine.” He shook it off. “Let’s go again.”

            It took a few times but we found our rhythm, even if it was a little choppier than usual.

            “Eyes up.”

            “Arms firm.”

            “Keep your shoulders back.”

            I kept tripping up as I tried to listen to every little thin Sebastian told me. After two songs, I stopped and huffed out of frustration. “You’re too tough.” I protested.

            He shook his head. “You should see Scarlett. She’s strict. She was a ballerina in Russia when she was sixteen.”

            “Oh, wow…what happened?”

            “She escaped just like me. Communism was getting worse but there didn’t seem to be an end to it. Now she teaches dance here.” He shrugged. "People are afraid to hire immigrants from the USSR. They're worried they're spies for communism." He rolled his eyes. "The level of fear in this world is unbelievable sometimes." 

            “Well, I’m glad you came here,” I said quietly. “I wish you didn’t have to go through that but I’m glad I met you.”

            Sebastian smiled at me. “Alright, enough with this boring stuff. Let’s let loose.” He went back to the stereo and switched tapes.

            “Will you teach me more fancy moves?” I asked.

            “What do you want to learn?” He wrapped his arms around my waist as the music changed again.

            “What do you call it when the woman jumps and the guy catches her?” I rested my hands on the nape of his neck and swayed with him to the new song.

            “A lift?”

            “Sure.”

            “Oh, I dunno. I’ve never done that. I think Scarlett has though. Maybe you can ask her.”

            “But I want to do it with you.”

            “You’re hard to say no to.” He chuckled and spun me around. But he didn’t bring me full circle. He stopped me with his hands on my hips so I was facing away from him. I could see us in the mirror and for a moment I couldn’t believe it was me.

            Sebastian ran a hand up my arm and lifted it so I reached back. My fingers found his hair and I lightly brushed up against his temple. He grazed his fingertips back down my arm and I squirmed a little. I giggled as his touch tickled me. He laughed softly and I could see him smiling in the mirror. He tilted his head and exhaled softly over my neck.

            Goosebumps covered my arms as we started to sway again. He focused a little more on my neck, though, as he kissed and lightly nibbled at my pulse point. I bit back a small moan and leaned against his chest, feeling his hips against mine.

            We were only lost for a moment before we heard someone open the door to the studio. Sebastian and I quickly put a reasonable distance between us.

            In walked a young man in business casual clothing. “Sebastian, what are you doing in here?” He gave him a stern look.

            For a moment, Sebastian seemed to freeze up. So I quickly jumped in. I had been getting better at lying it seemed. “He was helping me look for my hair barrette.”

            “Oh…” The man seemed to buy it purely on the fact that I was a guest. “My apologies. Did you find it yet?”

            “No, I must’ve lost it somewhere else. Thank you,” I turned to Sebastian, “for helping me though.”

            He cleared his throat. “Of course, miss.”

            “Sebastian, where’s Scarlett?” The man asked as we began to leave the studio. “She has a lesson here and she knows she must always arrive five minutes beforehand.” He checked the expensive watch on his wrist.

            “I don’t know, Michael.”

            “Why don’t you go track her down then?” He replied impatiently.

            Sebastian sighed and nodded down the path. “She’s right there.”

            Michael turned. “Ah, Scarlett, so nice of you to join us.”

            Scarlett’s face went sour when she saw the dark-haired man. “Alright, Michael, don’t get your panties in a bunch.” She hoisted a duffle bag further up her shoulder and walked past him.

            “Watch your tone.”

            She rolled her eyes and stomped up the stairs past Sebastian and me. “I was two minutes late.”

            “You should _always_ be on time.”

            “You know what, Michael,” She spun around to glare at him. “You’re not my boss. You don’t own this place yet.” She snapped.

            Michael squared off against her. “And when I do, I know the first person who’s going to be fired.”

            She narrowed her eyes. “I’m sure your dad would love to hear that you fired the resort’s best dance instructor.”

            “It won’t matter what he thinks.”

            “I have class, _Mikey,_ run along.” She hissed. “No one’s afraid of you.”

            Michael’s jaw tightened but it seemed like he didn’t want to make more of a scene in front of a guest. “Charlie, would you like me to escort you back to the hotel?” His voice was still tense.

            “Oh, uh…no thank you. I was going to ask Scarlett for a lesson.” I said, a little shaken by the encounter.

            “Very well. She will for as long as she still works here.” He replied sharply and turned to leave.

            “Asshole,” Scarlett muttered and walked into the studio with us following her.

            “Who was that?”

            “Michael, Robert’s eldest son,” Sebastian answered and leaned against the doorframe.

            “He must be back from another booze-filled romp around Europe,” Scarlett grumbled as she walked around the studio, preparing for her class. “No wonder it was so calm here. Now we get to listen to why women deserve to be barefoot and pregnant and why segregation is a good thing.” She spat. “He’s disgusting.”

            “At least Robert treats us like humans, Michael only respects rich white men like him,” Sebastian grumbled.

            I wrinkled my nose in distaste. “And he’ll own the resort?”

            “One day…I guess.”

            “Not if I have anything to do with it. He’s only picking on me because he tried hooking up with me and I told him no.” She made a face. “Even I liked men I still wouldn’t touch him.” She sighed and looked around with her hands on her hips. That’s when she noticed the stereo was still playing music, something Michael hadn’t realized.

            “What were you two doing in here?”

            Sebastian and I both blurted out different answers.

            “Looking for her barrette.”

            “Dancing.”

            We looked at each other in disbelief.

            “I thought you said we could trust her!”

            “She has a big mouth!”

            Scarlett just laughed and brushed us off. “Don’t worry, I won’t tell anyone. Just as long as you two weren’t fucking in my studio.”

            “Scarlett!”

            “Oh, my God…no we weren’t!”

            She cracked up even more at our reactions. “I’m just kidding, geez, you two are so cute.”

            Sebastian rolled his eyes. “Charlotte wants to learn how to do a lift.” He changed the subject quickly. “Would you teach us?”

            “Really?” She looked impressed. “Ambitious, but okay. I’ll teach you, sure.”

            “Awesome.” I brightened up. “So do we just have to book studio time or…”

            “Oh no, we’ll have to start next Saturday when we all go to the lake.”

            “The lake? Why?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sure Robert's sons are wonderful so I'm using my creative license to make up one. Yay antagonist!


	8. (Your Love Keeps Lifting Me) Higher and Higher

            _Your love, lifting me higher_

_Than I’ve ever been lifted before_

           

            “Are you sure your parents won’t be wondering where you are?” Sebastian asked as he grabbed two towels out of the back seat of his car.

            “My dad’s golfing and I think my mom and sister are taking a class.” I shrugged. “I said I’d be in the cabin reading.”

            “Alright, I’ll make sure you’re back at a reasonable hour.” He wrapped an arm around my shoulders.

            “Or not…” I giggled. “Is the water going to be cold?”

            “Probably.” He admitted. “But it’ll be fun.”

            “Sebastian!” Chris called us over from the small beach by the lake.

            A small group of the staff was already there, sitting around, laughing, and playing music. One of the many other boys named Chris had a guitar out and was messing around with the strings.

            “Look at Bucky with his hot shot girl!” The boy I recognized as Jeremy, crowed.

            Sebastian rolled his eyes. “I told you Scarlett had a big mouth.” He muttered to me as we walked over.

            I smiled and shrugged. “It could be worse.” I pointed out.

            “Mmf.”

 

            After adjusting to the cold lake water, Scarlett told us we would have our first lesson on lifts.

            “Water makes it easier to learn the motions of lifts. You get used to the motion and balance. If we did on the ground, you’d both get pretty badly bruised.

            Sebastian raised an eyebrow. “Sure you want to do this?” He asked me.

            “It could be fun.”

            “Charlie, you’re going to want to try to keep your balance as centered as possible. Sebastian will hold you by your hips so if you tilt too far forward or backward, you’ll both go down.” Scarlett explained. “I’m sure he’s strong enough to hold you but tip one way and you throw off both of your balances.”

            I nodded. “Okay.”

            “You won’t get it the first try or even the fifth. It’s all about learning from your mistakes and trying again.” She smiled and found a seat on one of the rocks poking out of the shallow water. “Go ahead.”

            “Ready?” Sebastian asked and held his hands out where I supposed to jump.

            Suddenly nervous, I went to jump but hesitated. “You’re going to catch me, right?”

            He smiled slightly. “Why wouldn’t I?”

            His answer was more than enough to make me try. And he did catch me, but as he lifted me, I panicked and flailed my arms.

            “Charl-” Sebastian fell backward, sending me face first into the water.

            When we resurfaced, Scarlett looked a little amused. “Now you see why I start in the water?”

            I pushed my hair from my eyes and sighed. “Let’s try again.”

           

            It was nearly an hour before Sebastian and I completed a lift that Scarlett was pretty proud of. I held steady for a few seconds and Sebastian kept me in the air for longer than we had been able to do before. I ended up slipping backward as he tried to put me back down, but Scarlett said it was a good start.

 

            The sun began to set and the group started a fire on the beach. It was starting to get a little cold so Sebastian grabbed an extra shirt he had from his car so I could wear it. I cuddled up in his lap, resting my back against his chest. He wrapped his arms around me.

            “Here,” Elizabeth, one of the girls who helped Scarlett teach, walked back over to us. “I knew I had an extra one in the truck.” She handed Sebastian a blanket.

            “Thanks, Lizzie.” He unfurled the blanket and made sure it covered us both.

            I inhaled softly and smelled Sebastian’s scent, which was getting more and more familiar to me. His specific cologne, the lingering presence of his leather jacket, and cigarette smoke.

            “So your dad’s a doctor, Charlie?” Anthony asked.

            “Yeah. He’s a surgeon.” I smiled and nodded.

            “I can respect that. He’s worked hard for his money.” He used a stick to poke at the fire.

            “Anthony,” Scarlett whispered in a scolding manner.

            I realized they had been all acting a little timid around me. They were all fairly polite which I didn’t see as odd. But if they were joking around and I was near, they usually stopped.

            They didn’t want to get in trouble.

            “I uh…I’m not like the other guests,” I said awkwardly.

            “Of course not, we weren’t saying that,” Scarlett assured me gently.

            “We’ve just never had a relationship with staff that lasted.” Elizabeth piped up.

            I glanced up at Sebastian but his eyes were on the fire. “Why?” I asked. “Why is it a rule?”

            Scarlett rolled her eyes. “Robert doesn’t want anything happening. I guess there are a million things that could happen from a guest dating someone from the staff. If it does happen, Robert or Michael is quick to shut it down. Then usually the person is fired.”

            I tensed up. Sebastian had mentioned being fired because of me but I never thought he was completely serious. “Sebastian…” I whispered and looked up at him again.

            “It’s fine, just don’t listen to them.” He mumbled. It seemed like he in denial.

            “So Sebastian, what is it like dating the younger sister of Evan’s love interest?” Jeremy called from across the bonfire.

            Sebastian groaned. “Alright, be quiet, Renner.”

            “You two could be brothers-in-law someday!” Scarlett exclaimed.

            Chris laughed and his face started to turn red. “Not in front of Charlie, guys, c’mon.”

            “It’s okay. You make her really happy.” I said with a smile. “I mean, I have to listen to how blue Chris’s eyes are and how he laughs. But it’s my sister so it’s worth it I guess.” Even I was a little surprised at what I was saying. Usually, I was always complaining about Laurie’s antics. But things had changed a lot. “But you might want to kiss her…” I nudged. “Because I don’t want her finding out that I’ve already kissed someone this summer before she did.”

            “You haven’t kissed her?” Anthony exclaimed. “Are you serious? Have you seen the way she looks at you?”

            “I know, I know! But we’ve always been in public or the moment’s not right.” Chris tried to explain himself. I will…I’m just worried.” He admitted. “I’m not as brave as Sebastian is.”

            They kept on with the banter while I turned to Sebastian. He wasn’t smiling and looked deep in thought about something. “Hey, are you…”

            “I should get you back to your cabin. It’s getting late.” He stood up and helped me to my feet.

            After saying goodbye to everyone, I walked with Sebastian back to the car. “You can’t lose this job, Sebastian…” I whispered.

            “Charlotte…”

            “Please just listen to me. I know I might not know as much about this world or how complicated things can be. But I know that love isn’t always worth it.”

            Sebastian opened the car door for me. “It is.” He said quietly. “You don’t have to worry about it.”

           

            The next morning, it was pouring rain. I could hear it on the cabin roof and smell it in the air. I sat up and found my sister sitting on the edge of her bed. Her arms and legs were crossed and her lips were pursed.

            “Good morn…”

            “Where were you last night?” She demanded. “And don’t give me some stupid excuse because I know you’ve been lying to me, mom, and dad.”

            I rubbed my eyes. It was too early to be in the line of questioning. “Can’t you just mind your own business?”

            “No, because my baby sister just disappeared last night. I asked everyone and no one had seen you. I was worried sick but I had to keep lying to mom and dad so you wouldn’t get in trouble!” She exclaimed.

            I felt a bit of guiltiness knowing she hadn’t ratted on me. “I thought you loved tattling on me.”

            “I thought we were getting closer, so I decided not to. We’re adults, Charlie, not kids. But you’re still only eighteen. You can’t disappear like that.” Laurie snapped.

            I sighed and stood up to brush my teeth. “I was perfectly safe, you don’t have to worry about that.”

            “You don’t know this area. You could’ve gotten lost or hurt. You could’ve gotten kidnapped! What were you thinking? You better not do that again.” She warned.

            I spat the toothpaste out and made a face in the mirror. She was being protective but of course, only my sister could be irritating while doing so. “Yes, mother.”

            “Don’t be like that. I’m looking out for your best interest and…whose shirt is that?” She demanded as I walked out of the bathroom.

            I glanced down and to my horror, found I had slept in Sebastian’s shirt. I wasn’t going to be able to lie my way out of this one. “Uh…it was in my suitcase. Maybe it’s dad’s”

            Laurie stood up and grabbed the hem of the shirt. She sniffed it and her eyes widened. “That’s _not_ dad’s cologne. Were you with a boy?” She demanded.

            “What….”

            “Did you have sex?!” She shrieked.

            “Shut up, do you want mom and dad to hear you?” I hissed. “God, no, I didn’t have sex. Just let it go, Laurie.”

            “I will not let it go! You better not have lost your virginity before me! And you better not be having sex with strangers!” I could tell she was bordering on the line of being worried for my safety and worried that I had sex before her.

            “I didn’t! For Christ sake, yes I was with a boy.” I decided the only way of getting her off the topic was being a bit truthful.

            Laurie gasped. “You were? Who?!”

            “None of your business.” I snapped. “I was with a boy and we did not have sex. It was cold last night so he gave this to me. Now, will you please leave me alone?” I begged and rifled through my suitcase.

            Laurie peered over my shoulder. “What’s he like?” She asked.

            I threw my hands up in the air. “What will it take for you to leave me alone?”

            “Just tell me what he’s like and I won’t ask again.” She sat back on her bed and patted the bedspread beside her.

            I winced and slowly stood up. I sat beside her and let her hug me close.

            “My baby sister has a crush!” She squealed and kicked her legs excitedly. “Now, tell me all about him please!”

            I rolled my eyes but couldn’t help a small smile forming on my face. “He’s tall.”

            Laurie screeched again. “What are his eyes like?”

            I blushed and looked down at my hands. “They’re like…a gray color. But they have some blue to them.” I said quietly.

            “Oh my goodness!” My sister kept shaking me violently.

            “He’s got really nice hair, it’s a dark brown…his voice is beautiful. When I’m with him…I feel special and it’s almost like he looks at me differently. Like…he’ll look at the rest of the world one way but when he looks at me…” I opened my mouth slightly and laughed softly. “It’s different and he makes my knees weak.”

            Laurie let go of me and pretended to faint against the pillows. “Little Charlie finally has a boyfriend! I never thought I’d see the day.”

            “Okay, okay, that’s enough.” I grabbed a pillow and smacked her. “Please don’t tell mom or dad, okay?”

            She glanced up at me with a smile. “Of course. Your secret’s safe with me. Now, let me tell you more about Chris…”

            I smiled and sat down with a sigh. “Okay, tell me more about Chris.”


	9. Up on the Roof/In the Still of the Night

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings: xenophobia

            _In the still of the night._

_I held you, held you tight._

_At night the stars put on a show for free_

_And darling you can share it all with me_

            One night at dinner, around mid-June, I was watching Sebastian playing the piano. I was in a bit of a daze as I gazed on with my chin resting on my hand. I didn’t know how he made playing the piano look so gorgeous, but he did. He was so enraptured, I was sure he wasn’t paying attention to anything else but the keys in front of him. It was like his emotions and thoughts matched up perfectly with the music he played.

            It was beautiful. He was beautiful.

            “Charlie…”

            “What?” I snapped back into attention.

            “Charlie, Michael was asking to dance with you.” My mother smiled warmly.

            I looked up and to my horror, saw Robert’s son holding a hand out to me. “Oh, I uh…I don’t dance.”

            “Nonsense, I heard you were taking lessons. I’m sure she’s just shy.” He said to my parents.”

            I wasn’t sure who told him I was taking lessons with Scarlett. But he wasn’t wrong. Usually, Sebastian and I worked on the lift every few days or so. Scarlett excused it as a private lesson.

            “Go on, honey. You haven’t danced at all this vacation.” My father nodded.

            I glanced over at Sebastian on the piano. “I uh…” My stomach started to feel queasy as I tried to find an exit.

            “Mom, she doesn’t want to dance,” Laurie muttered. Even my sister picked up on my discomfort. I guessed she could tell Michael _wasn’t_ the boy I was telling her about.

            “Laurie, hush, let your sister have some fun.” My mom said and nudged me. “Go on, Charlie.”

            I stood up stiffly and took Michael’s hand. I followed him to the dance floor, still trying to find an escape route. Would it be too forward to say I was on my period? Again I looked at Sebastian but he was still too focused on the piano still.

            I glanced over at the group of waiters and saw Chris with the same look of unease that I probably had too. I locked eyes with him and mouthed a very subtle, ‘ _help_ ’ to him.

            He seemed to understand completely and nodded. I saw him duck over to the stage and walked up to Sebastian.

            I didn’t see their interaction because Michael stepped in front of me. He rested a hand on my hip and took my hand in his. “I was thinking a lot about after we saw each other the other day.”

            I swallowed and nodded. “Okay.”

            “I think we got off on the wrong foot. I just want you to know that I’m not really like that.” He said in a smooth voice. He looked eerily like Robert but his mannerisms were very different. He was slick, but not in a good way. Every word out of his mouth sounded like a lie and I couldn’t be certain that it wasn’t.

            “Like what?” I started to dance with him. I felt my whole body was completely tense, much like when I danced with Sebastian for the first time. But I knew I wouldn’t relax, I couldn’t when this man was touching me.

            “Overpowering. But sometimes you need to be strict with these workers.” Michael continued.

            I felt a sickening feeling go up my spine. “They’ve all be nothing but nice to me.”

            “They’re supposed to. But some of them will give you attitude. It’s almost like they forget I can fire them. Some of them I could even have deported.” He chuckled. “My father is foolish for hiring immigrants. They’re nothing but…”

            I grit my teeth and forcefully stomped on his foot. “Oops, I stepped on the one.” I snarled and tore my hand away from him before storming off.

            I heard the piano music suddenly stop as I left the ballroom. I walked out of the hotel and into the cool summer air.

            Someone grabbed my hand and I whipped around, ready to deck Michael in the face if he touched me again.

            “Hey, whoa! It’s just me.” Sebastian held his hands up.

            I huffed and started to relax when I saw him. “Sorry.” My voice was still tense.

            “What happened?”

            “Aren’t you mad that I danced with him?” I didn’t want to tell him what Michael was about to say about him and the other immigrant workers.

            “No, I figured you didn’t want to.” He shrugged and put his hands in his pockets. “You didn’t…right?”

            “That son of a…” I threw my hands up. “He’s the worst!”

            “Welcome to the club of hating him.” He grimaced. “I’m sorry. If I could, I would have made him sorry for putting his hands on you.” He grumbled. “If I could have punched him all the times I’ve wanted to, he’d probably be laid up in the hospital.”

            “I stepped on his foot,” I admitted.

            Sebastian’s face lit up a little. “You did?”

            “I stepped on the one on purpose,” I smirked slightly.

            “That’s my girl.” He grinned and wrapped an arm around me. “C’mon, I want to show you something.”

           

            Sebastian pushed up a small hatch after bringing me to the very top of the hotel. He climbed up a ladder and reached down to take my hand.

            “Don’t worry, it’s perfectly safe.” He said and helped me up. The brisk air hit me and I realized we were back outside and on top of the roof.

            I gasped softly as I saw the view from the tall manor. “Wow…”

            “This is another secret you don’t tell Robert.” Sebastian smiled and laid out a blanket he’d snatched from one of the maid carts on our way upstairs. We sat down and he held me close like he did in front of the bonfire.

            “I’m going to have a whole trove of secrets by the time the summer is over,” I said and took in the landscape. The mountains were clearly visible from our spot on the roof. The sun was still setting and the sky was a dark purple and pink.

            “Sometimes, when I’m up here I think about the American Dream. I mean, they talk about mountains in that song, right?”

            “Which one?”

            “I don’t know, some patriotic song.”

            “ _This Land is your Land?_ I don’t know if they talk about mountains in that one.”

            He smiled and shook his head. “No, I like that one. Some of the staff sings that when we have bonfires.”

            “Oh, _America the Beautiful_.” I guessed.

            “Yeah, that’s the one. I feel like most of the songs about America just talk about how nice the landscaping is or about some old war.”

            I giggled. “I never thought about that, but yeah you’re right.” I agreed. “Well, I guess our history has a lot to be ashamed of.”

            “Yeah, every country does. At least you never had communism.” His lips quirked up and he glanced over at me. “That was a joke.”

            I winced. “Michael was talking about you.”

            “Me?”

            “Well, not you specifically. He was talking about immigrants.”

            Sebastian’s face clouded over. “That moron. He knows nothing about hardship. He was raised with a fucking gold spoon in his mouth and he acts like he was a right to judge other people for where they came from or what color their skin is.”

            “Sebastian…” I gently stroked his hair back.

            “Don’t apologize for him.” He interrupted me. “You are the complete opposite of him.”

            I looked down. “Still…” I sighed and leaned back so I could see the stars. Sebastian gently stroked his fingers down my cheeks and to my shoulders. He laced his fingers in with mine, resting them on my stomach.

            “See anything up there?”

            “A few UFOs, nothing out of the ordinary.” My eyes flicked to his face and I grinned.

            He laughed and leaned down to kiss my forehead. “Funny and beautiful, and to think when we met I lumped you together with all the rest of those trust fund babies.”

            “What about when you danced with me?” I wondered as I gazed at the sprinkle of stars across the darkening sky.

            “I wished you weren’t a guest.” He admitted with a shrug. “Because I thought that even if you liked me back, it wouldn’t matter.”

            “When did you decide to break the rules?” I gently squeezed his hands.

            “I don’t know for sure.” He paused for a moment to think. “I guess when Scarlett was talking to me. She made me think about the ‘what ifs’. I couldn't get you out of my head." 

           I smiled and glanced up at him. "Can you please kiss me?" I murmured softly. 

          "You don't have to ask twice." He chuckled and leaned down to kiss me. 


	10. Rhythm of the Rain/You Don't Own Me

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sexual themes

            _Listen to the rhythm of the falling rain_

_Telling me just what a fool I’ve been._

_I wish that it would go and let me cry in vain_

_And let me be alone again._

_I’m young and I love to be young_

_I’m free and I love to be free_

_To live my life the way I want._

The next few weeks I was able to avoid Michael. Though I heard he was trying to get in contact with me. It made me nervous to think what he could possibly want with me. I wasn’t stupid enough to believe that he would want to apologize to me. So I did everything I could to make sure we were never alone together.

Sebastian and I were still working on the lift and were getting closer as we did it. It was good because I managed to balance my time between him and my family. Since he was working, we couldn’t be together all the time. I managed to get a few minutes with him during breaks and a few smiles here and there during the day. Sometimes we got a few hours during the day with Scarlett. On his days off, I made an excuse to spend time with him. Meanwhile, Laurie was still trying to figure out whom I was seeing. At least she was getting to be more pleasant to be around.

 

It started to rain on our way back to the resort. We had spent Sebastian’s day off by driving around and talking. The sun had started to set and dark clouds rolled in with heavy rain.

            “What’s going to happen when the summer ends?” It was mid-July and time was moving too fast for me. I hadn’t even realized June was already gone.

            “What do you mean?” Sebastian glanced away from the road for a second.

            “I mean…you and me.”

            “Well, I’m going to head down to that little town we passed. I usually work odd jobs in the winter. If I can get a full-time job, I will. And I guess you’ll go back home. Aren’t you going to start the application process for the Peace Corps?”

            I swallowed and nodded. “Yeah, I guess,” I mumbled and thought to myself for a second. “So, it’ll just be over?”

            “We can call each other and write too. But, you said it was a four-hour drive.” He reminded me.

            “I know but…”

            “Your family will be here next summer, right? We can pick up where we left off.”

            “After nine months?”

            “I don’t know what to tell you, Charlotte.” He stared forward at the rain falling on the road ahead of us. The heel of his hand rested on top of the steering wheel, his other hand was placed on my knee.

            “I might be leaving soon…I don’t know where I’m going or whether I’ll be able to stay in contact with you!” I exclaimed and felt an increasing sense of panic. There wasn’t enough time left in the summer. There wasn’t enough time left with him.

            “Okay, I know.”

            “Don’t just say it’s okay. You know but you don’t even want to plan for it.” Tension bubbled in my throat.

            “How am I supposed to plan for it?” He hit the heel of his hand on the steering wheel for a brief second. 

            “I don’t know!” I was on the verge of becoming hysterical and I didn't care that he was getting frustrated.

            “Charlotte, just calm down.” He said firmly and kept his eyes on the road. 

            “Don’t tell me to calm down,” I cried. “Pull over.”

            “Charlotte.”

            “Pull over!”

            He sighed heavily and stopped on the side of the back road we were traveling on. "Alright, here. Now can we please just be reasonable and-"

            Once he stopped, I got out of the car and stepped into the pouring rain. I crossed my arms over my chest and began to walk up the road to the resort.

            He rolled the passenger side window down. “Are you kidding me?” He started to drive next to me. “Get in the car, you’re being ridiculous.”

            I didn’t respond. I just kept walking. I was almost thankful it was raining, I didn’t want him to see me cry.

            “You’re seriously doing this? Are you seriously going to make me do this? Fine.” He groaned and I watched as he sped up and slammed on the brakes. He parked on the side again, blocking my path. He got out and slammed the driver’s side door. I could see the frustration on his face as he walked around the back of the car to me.

            “Now we’re both in the fucking rain, is that what you wanted?” He snapped and threw his hands up. "You wanted to be dramatic, well here you go, be dramatic." 

            I couldn’t help but burst into tears. “I don’t know why you’re yelling at me!” I balled my hands into fists and tried to stand strong but I felt like a child under his look.

            “Because you’re acting like a spoiled brat.” He shouted back at me. “You want to see the real world but you can’t seem to handle it when it’s knocking on your door. You want the real world? This is the real world!” He held his arms out. “It’s fucking difficult and it’s not fun! It's hard and things don't always end up the way you want. You expect me to follow you back home? Somewhere I can’t afford, somewhere they won’t hire me because I wasn’t fucking born here? Your dad won’t want me around and your family will hate me.”

            “No, they won’t.” I sobbed stubbornly and stomped my foot on the wet pavement. I wanted to just block him out. 

            “Wake up, Charlotte!” He yelled in exasperation. “They don’t want their precious baby Charlie with an immigrant who can’t provide for her.”

            I hiccupped and felt my knees weaken. I didn’t want to listen to him. I didn’t want to believe that what he was saying was true. “You said…you promised…” I couldn’t even finish my thought I was in such a frantic state.

            He shook his head and wiped the rain off his face. He paced a few steps, pinching the bridge of his nose and hitting his hand on the trunk of his car. “I’m sorry, maybe I was wrong for doing this. This is my fault.”

            “No,” I gasped. “I thought you cared for me.” I accused.

            “Who said I didn’t care for you?” He demanded and faced me again. “If I didn’t care for you, I would’ve driven away and left you in the rain. But I didn’t because I love you.”

            I whimpered and wrapped my arms around myself to keep warm in the cold rain. “No you don’t.”

            “Stop.” He sighed and hugged me close. “You have no idea how much I love you.”

            I just sniffled and felt utterly pathetic.

            “Just….Please get in the car, I’ll drive you back.”

 

            This time I listened. He drove up to the resort and was about to head down the path to our cabin.

            “I want to stay with you,” I whispered. He only nodded and took the next road. I guess he didn't want to argue with me anymore. Or he didn't want me to leave.

            His cabin was far in the back with the rest of the staffs’. We ran in even though we were already soaked from standing so long in the rain. Once inside, he turned on the lights while I took off my soaked socks and Keds.

            It looked almost identical to the dance studio, just converted into a room. A mattress sat on the floor, mirrors covered one wall, and the floor was still the same hardwood.

            “You can wear some of my clothes.” He started rummaging through drawers. “We’ll hang yours up and hopefully they’ll be dry by tomorrow morning.”

            I nodded quietly and shrugged off my sweater. I hung it on one of the many racks that must have been installed from the days when it was a studio.

            “Here.” He handed me a soft t-shirt, a pair of clean boxers, and a towel. Then, he promptly turned around to give me privacy.

            I set the clothes down and unbuttoned my blouse. I hung it with my sweater and glanced over at the mirror. I could see Sebastian’s back as he faced the corner. I stood in just a bra and damp shorts. My eyes were red from crying and my curls were just wet strands against my face. I sniffed and ran the towel through my hair a few times. Glancing down at the clothes, I realized I was in a bit of a daze. Before that summer, it wasn’t natural for me to take charge. But I wanted to.

            I stepped up on his mattress so I could reach him a little better. I let my fingers trail up his side to pull his shirt over his head.

            He jumped a little bit, not expecting it. But he didn’t say anything, he just let me toss the shirt aside and snake my arms around his shoulders. I pressed my hands to his chest and started to kiss and nibble the shell of his ear.

            “Charlotte…” He groaned softly.

            “Dance with me.” I pled.

            “I can't.” He closed his eyes and shook his head. “You deserve more.”

            “You don’t own me.” I kissed over his pulse point.

            “No one does.”

            “Then dance with me.”

            That seemed to break down his resistance and he turned around. He didn’t seem too fazed that I was shirtless. He merely grabbed my hips and pulled me against him. He touched his forehead to mine and we moved only to the rhythm of the rain and our heartbeats.

            "Don't waste this on me." He breathed. 

            "Don't tell me what to do," I replied and tangled my fingers in his hair.

            He lowered his hands to my thighs and lifted me effortlessly into his arms. I took his face in my hands and kissed him feverishly. I knew what I wanted and there wasn’t a doubt in my mind as he pressed me up against the mirrored wall.

            I gasped softly against his lips when I felt his hips grind against mine. He moaned in response and gripped my thighs tightly. He broke the kiss for a moment and I started to kiss his shoulder. I moved my way up to his collarbone and was none too gentle as I sucked on his tan skin.

            “Fuck…” He grunted and buried his face in the crook of my neck. “Charlotte…” He snarled lustfully.

            I lightly kissed the bruising mark already forming. “Kiss me.” I murmured and he obliged.

 

            The rain stopped the next morning. The sun peeked out and birds were singing outside Sebastian’s cabin.

            I blinked a few times to get the sleep out of my eyes. I stretched and sighed softly. I knew I was in his bed, tangled up in his sheets, and resting on his pillow. The night before hadn’t been a dream it was all too real. But I was a little disappointed to find Sebastian wasn’t in bed next to me. I sat up, pulling the sheets with me to cover myself.

            That’s when Sebastian walked out of the bathroom with a toothbrush in his mouth. He smiled and went to spit the toothpaste out in the sink. “I thought I heard you up.” He walked over to the mattress. He was wearing a pair of boxers and his hair was mussed up from the night before.

            I smiled and laid back as he crawled back onto the bed, hovering over me. He kissed my lips a few times and ran his fingers through my unruly curls.

            “You still alright with last night?” He asked.

            I nodded and smoothed his hair back only to have it stick up again. “More than you’ll know.” I reached up to capture his lips again.

            He drew away after a moment. “You should probably get back before your sister wakes up.” He said and used his hands to get back up.

            I sighed but had no desire to leave. “I don’t care if she knows.”

            “You don’t think she’ll tell your parents?” He asked and went to pull on some pants.

            “I don’t care if they know,” I said and crossed my arms over my chest. “I mean, I can just tell them about her and Chris. It’s the same thing.”

            “Chris comes from a good family,” Sebastian told me. “They might not be as well off but he was born here and has some money to his name. I’m a different story.”

            I sighed. “People worry too much about money,” I complained.

            He smiled slightly and went to retrieve my clothes off the hooks where he had put them last night before I fell asleep. “You’re not scared of anything are you?” He teased.

            My smile wavered as I took the still slightly damp clothes in my hands. “Me?” I laughed humorlessly. “I’m scared of everything. I’m scared of what’s ahead of me, what I’ll see, what I’ll lose, and most of all…” I felt tears stinging my eyes again. “I’m scared of walking out of this room and never feeling the rest of my whole like the way I feel when I’m with you. I’ve pretended for so long that I didn’t need anyone and I was going to do these impossible things but…I can’t. I can’t do any of it.” Tears fell from my eyes.

            Sebastian’s smile fell and he walked over to me. “Charlotte…” He knelt down beside the mattress and took my hands into his. “You don’t need me or anyone else to feel confident or proud of yourself.” He kissed my knuckles. “You don’t need me.”

            “You’re wrong…I love you and I’m afraid that after this summer…”    

            “Hey, sh…” He whispered. “We’ll figure that out.” He promised. “But you don’t need me. You don’t need anyone. You’re strong enough that when you do the incredible things you’re going to do, you’ll be confident enough on your own.”

             "I'm going to make you late." I realized and started to get dressed. 

             Sebastian caught me by my waist before I could go anywhere. He reeled me in again, pressing my back to his chest. "Before you go, tell me you love me again." He kissed over my pulse point. 

             I smiled and reached up to touch his cheek. "I love you," I said confidently and kissed his jaw lightly. "I'll see you later." I murmured and left. 


	11. (You Make Me Feel Like a) Natural Woman

            _Looking out at the morning rain_

_I used to feel uninspired_

_Before the day I met you, life was so unkind_

_But your loving was the key to my peace of mind_

            I managed to sneak back into the cabin before Laurie woke up. I slipped into a nightshirt and under the covers. I laid there, looking at small raindrops trickling off the tree outside our window.

            I thought things would change after I lost my virginity. Maybe I’d feel taller or more confident. But I felt exactly the same just maybe a little less tense. Yet, there was no regret or fear. I knew Sebastian assumed I would regret it.

            Right before I fell asleep, he kissed my temple. He stood up and gathered my wet clothes off the floor. I heard him humming softly to himself as he hung them up to dry.

            “Will you still love me tomorrow?” I whispered along to his hum.

            He didn’t seem to hear me as he settled back down next to me. I didn’t know how to assure him that everything was perfect.

            “Charlie!”

            I jolted when I heard my sister screech quietly. “What?” I was afraid she knew everything, or at the very least knew I hadn’t been in the cabin all night.

            “Guess who kissed me last night in the rain?” Laurie threw a pillow over her face to muffle an excited scream.

            I let out a hysterical little laugh, which she assumed was out of happiness for her.

            “I know, right?” She squealed and hugged the pillow to her chest. “I have never been as happy as I am right now.” She sighed and smiled up at the ceiling.

            “Well, I’m happy for you,” I said feeling a little strange that my sister had kissed someone and that same night, I lost my virginity. I didn’t want to tell her now. Maybe when we were thirty or forty.

            “I think we’re going to get married.”

            I laughed softly and shook my head. “You have the rest of your life to figure that out, Laurs, just enjoy your time with him.”

 

            My sister and I walked up to brunch together where I knew Sebastian was playing. We avoided the large puddles left over from the storm before. My sister linked arms with me and chatted away about how her night with Chris went, second by second. I listened and commented about how she always dreamed of being kissed in the rain. She had told me many times after seeing some movie where the main characters did just that.

            We were about to walk in the ballroom, just as Michael was leaving. He looked happy to see me and it made my stomach turn.

            “Charlie, good, I was hoping I’d see you here.” He smiled at my sister. “Laurie, nice to see you.”

            “Good to see you too Michael.” Laurie kept me close. She instantly put up a wall of older sister protection.

            “Charlie, I was hoping to talk to you in private…”

            “And she would love to do that, but not right now. She’s been bugging me about how hungry she is the whole way up here. C’mon, Charlie.” She tugged me into the ballroom before Michael could say anything else.

            “Thank you,” I said quietly.

            “I hate the way he looks at you.” She grumbled and let go of my arm once we were in the clear. “He’s not the guy, right?”

            “No, quite the opposite,” I replied as I heard soft piano music floating over the room. I smiled instantly and I didn’t even have to turn. I could feel his presence.

            My sister and I sat down and I made sure I was sitting so I could see the stage.

            “I always forget how handsome that piano player is. What’s his name?”

            “Sebastian,” I said quietly and realized I was staring like a lovesick puppy.

            “Hah! It is him.”

            “What?” I snapped back to attention and looked at my sister. “I don’t know what you mean.”

            “Oh, I think you do.” Laurie leaned back smugly. “Every meal he plays, you’re staring at him, I’ve seen you walking with him a few times, _and_ Chris is best friends with him so he told me about Sebastian’s secret relationship. Plus, you’ve been acting strangely all summer so it had to be someone you’re not supposed to be seeing.”

            I never pegged Laurie for being a detective type. I groaned and ducked my head. “Please, please, please, promise you won’t tell mom or dad,” I begged.

            “I won’t.” Laurie looked proud of herself. “But I knew it.”

            “Alright, fine, you knew it. But you need to keep your big mouth shut about it.” I hissed. “Sebastian could be fired if anyone else finds out.”

            She looked confused. “Why? Robert knows I’m dating Chris.” She said nonchalantly.

            “What? I thought…”

            “Chris talked to him about it and he said it was fine. Mom and dad know about it and they like Chris.” She smiled. “I thought you knew that.”

            I figured I’d been too busy sneaking around with Sebastian to pay much attention to family affairs. “That’s…good,” I said but felt a little jealous. I knew things couldn’t be the same for Sebastian and me.

            “You should talk to Robert.” She suggested. “You don’t have to sneak around all the time. Doesn’t that get tiring?”

            I bit my lip and glanced over at Sebastian. He caught my eye and smiled warmly. “It’s different,” I said.

            “Why?”

            “I don’t think dad would approve.”

            “ _Why?_ ” My sister pressed. “Is he a criminal?”

            “No.”

            “Is he forty?”

            “No!”

            “Oh my God…are we related to him?!”

            “No, Laurie, for Christ sake!” I smacked her arm. “You’re so dramatic.”

            She made a face. “Then tell me why.” She demanded. “I’m your older sister and if he’s some sort of lunatic, you need to tell me.”

            “He’s not. He’s absolutely perfect.” I said and felt my chest tighten. “But because he’s an immigrant, dad won’t accept him.”

            “Oh…well…have you even asked?” She wondered.

            “Yeah, I’ll just bring it up next time we have dinner.” I scoffed.

            “I mean, just try to bring up the issue. Maybe he’s fine with it.”

            “Him being fine with it and having his daughter date an immigrant is two different issues.” I pointed out. She went to say something else but I cut her off. “Laurie, I appreciate it. But I’ll figure it out. If you could just keep it quiet, that would be great.” I smiled weakly.

            She touched my hand. “Of course. What else are sisters for?” Her sentence ended an octave higher when she saw Chris walking over.

            He smiled goofily when he saw Laurie. They were a match made in heaven that was for sure. “Hey.” He said shyly.

            “Hi, Chris.” Laurie smiled.

            “Hey, Chris.” I greeted even though I wasn’t sure if he had seen me or not.

            I guess he had because he cleared his throat and looked over at me. “Hey, so uh…” He nodded towards the stage.

            I could tell he was being conspicuous because Laurie was there. “She already knows,” I informed him and rolled my eyes.

            “Are they good with each other?” Laurie asked.

            Chris looked surprised. “Oh uh…yeah, I think so.” He smiled and nodded. “Anyways, he’ll be on break in a minute.”

            I nodded. “Thanks, Chris.” I stood up and headed to the back of the hotel, passing by the stage. I caught Sebastian’s eye and nodded slightly.

 

            Sebastian walked outside with his hands in his pockets and whistling the last song he was playing at brunch.

            “I wasn’t tripping you up, was I?” I teased.

            “You can’t smile at me like that in the middle of playing. I lose my train of thought.” He grinned and leaned in to kiss me slowly.

            “Oh, you know sometimes you just stumble upon things that are too good to be true.”

            Sebastian and I instantly tensed up when we heard that arrogant voice. We knew exactly who it was. I parted away from Sebastian and turned.

            Michael stood a few feet behind us with a triumphant smile. “Charlie, you don’t need to go dumpster diving.” He assured me as if he knew everything. “You could have a nice man from a nice family.

            I clenched my jaw and tried to hold back all the venomous words I had for him. “Just leave us alone.” I spat.

            “Oh, Charlie, he’s breaking the rules. He’ll lose his job, but of course, you probably knew that.” Michael tilted his head to the side with a simpering look.

            “Her name is Charlotte,” Sebastian spoke up with a quiet fury.

            “It’s okay,” I whispered and touched his upper arm. I didn’t want him to get into more trouble just in case I was able to help him keep his job. “I can handle this.”

            “You need her to fight your own battles?” Michael chuckled. “Pathetic.”

            I stood between Sebastian and him. “I’ll talk to Robert, you won’t be able to do anything.” I spat and guided Sebastian away with me. I stormed in through the hotel and right to Robert’s office. I knocked quickly and opened the door.

            Robert looked up in surprise. “Charlie?”

            “I’m in love with Sebastian.” I skipped the formalities.

            The owner of the resort sighed deeply and ran a hand over his face. “You girls are going to make me retire early.”

            “Sir, I’m sorry, I know it’s against the rules and…”

            “Sebastian.” Robert held up a hand to stop him. “I understand.” He leaned back in the chair behind his desk and looked at us. “Did you know I met Susan here?” He asked.

            “No…” We both shook our heads.

            “She was working as one of the counselors for the little kids. I was visiting during my summer break from university.” The older man smiled at the memory. She had two kids hanging off her as she tried to lead the rest of them to the lake. I asked if she needed help and that’s how I was roped into helping her the rest of the summer. It was a few weeks before I told her who I was, but she didn’t care. She didn’t treat me differently as other people did. My father didn’t approve but I married her anyway. But I had to keep his rule of staff and guest relationships.”

            I swallowed and felt uneasy. “But you know what it feels like,” I whispered.

            “I can’t stop you two from seeing each other. And, Sebastian, I won’t fire you. I know you’re a hardworking man and I wouldn’t have the heart to punish you for something like this.” Robert said. “But Charlie, I need you to tell your parents.”

            My heart stuttered. “What? Why? They don’t need to know.” I said quickly.

            He gave me a look. “Either you tell them, or I do.”

            I bit the inside of my cheek and looked at Sebastian. He seemed just as uncomfortable with the idea as I did. “Alright,” I said quietly. "I'll tell them tonight." 


	12. Rhapsody in Blue

            I didn’t enjoy the game of golf, but my father did. I figured if he was calm and doing something he loved, he would take the news better.

            So he drove us out to the course in a golf cart, just him and I. I wrung my hands together nervously and tried to come up with the exact wording.

           

_We haven’t talked too much about me dating…_

_I think it’s important that you know…_

_Just so you know…_

_You know the piano player…_

_I’m not pregnant; just want to say that flat out…_

            I bit the inside of my cheek and realized brainstorming wasn’t helping my nerves. I just needed to say it, no matter how awkward it came out.

           

            We arrived at another hole and my dad parked the cart. “Isn’t this fun?” He asked and grabbed a driver out of his golf bag. “You know, I knew that if you gave golf a chance you’d have fun.”

            “Yeah…” I swallowed and felt the words about to come out like vomit.

            “We haven’t had much time together this summer, so I’m glad we’re doing this.”

            _You won’t be glad in two seconds._ “Me too.”

            “I’m just happy that you and Laurie are finally getting along. I always told you two that once you become adults, you’d be the best of friends.” He smiled and put a hand on my shoulder.

            “Yeah, I guess you were right.” I nodded.

            “This is such great weather for golfing.” He said and started to tee up. “Not a cloud in the sky!”

            As he swung, I couldn’t hold it in any longer.

            “I’m dating the piano player!” I blurted.

            My father completely missed the golf ball and scraped up a bunch of grass in the process. He nearly let go of the club completely.

            We were silent for a moment and he stood totally still, his body still prepared to swing a golf club.

            “What?” He finally looked up at me.

            I fidgeted with my hands. “Sebastian, the one who plays piano in the hotel. I’ve been seeing him for a little over a month.” I said quietly.

            He opened his mouth but just shook his head. “When…when were you going to tell me?” He asked.

            “Now…well no. I wasn’t going to tell you.” I admitted. “Robert told me I had to tell you. I didn’t want Sebastian to get fired and Robert’s son was threatening us.”

            “Michael was threatening you?” My father’s face was a mix of confusion and anger.            

            “That’s…not really the issue.” I cleared my throat. “I just need you to know because he’s so important to me.”

            “Charlie, I just don’t know why…” My father ran a hand over his face and he looked so torn. “You’re only eighteen.”

            “I know, and I’m sorry. I didn’t think you’d approve but he means so much to me. I love him.”

            “You’re too young to know what love is.” He walked over to me. “I’m not angry at you.” He prefaced. “But I’m worried.”

            “Please just have dinner with us. You can meet him and you’ll see why I care so much about him.” I begged. As scary as it sounded, I hoped dinner with Sebastian and my family would clear everything up. My father would see what a good man he was and give his blessing.

            “I don’t-alright.” He caved in.

 

            The entire table was silent. I just wanted to slip under the expensive, linen tablecloth and disappear. But Sebastian was braving it so I had to too.

            He was wearing his usual formal attire for dinner but he wasn’t playing the piano. Instead, he was sitting at the table with my family. He stood straight and looked uneasy but tried to mask it with a polite smile.

            “So, Sebastian, you’re a very gifted piano player.” My father began the conversation as drinks were being poured.

            “Thank you, Dr. Howe.” He replied.

            “I appreciate the formalities, but there’s no need. You’re with family.” My father smiled albeit he still seemed tense.

            I hoped it was a step in the right direction so I squeezed Sebastian’s hand under the table.

            “Do you have a favorite composer?” My mother asked.

            “There’s so many I’m not sure I could pick just one. I think all the greats have their own specialties. But my mother is very fond of Gershwin and Debussy. She really enjoys the work of the more modern composers, mostly jazz artists.”

            “My husband always loved jazz and swing music.” My mother smiled. “Isn’t that right, George?”

            My father chuckled. “Well, I wasn’t the only one. Your mother was quite the dancer in her days.”

            “It was the Great Depression, that’s all you guys could do for entertainment.” Laurie jabbed.

            My parents laughed. “That’s true.” My father agreed. “We couldn’t go to the movies or spend money shopping like you girls. You’re both very fortunate.”

            Sebastian smiled slightly and I could feel the air growing less tense between us all. I relaxed and realized I just needed to let things flow naturally.

            “Sebastian, do you play golf?” My father asked.

            “I can’t say I’m any good, sir, but I find it relaxing. Just don’t expect me to bet any money, I’m sure you’re much better.” He answered.

            It was strange hearing Sebastian speak my family’s language. It was as if he’d learned from working here for a few years. There was a shift in his dialect and I realized he was trying to sound more American and wealthier. He was mirroring my parents so they would like him.

            I wished it were easier for them to just like the man that I saw every day. Not the one who needed to change his personality to fit in. But I couldn’t step in. If this is what we had to do to be accepted, then we would. We knew who each other really were.

            “Charlie said you’ve lived here for a few years. Have you always lived in New York or were you from out of state?” My father asked.  

            I tensed up and realized this was the deciding factor.

            “I uh…I’m from out of state,” Sebastian said.

            No. I wouldn’t let him lie about his upbringing. “He’s from Romania,” I said.

            Sebastian looked at me with a level of fear in his eyes. He was worried, just as I was.

            My father and mother glanced at each other for a moment. “Romania? That’s in Eastern Europe?” She asked. 

            “Yes, ma’am.” Sebastian swallowed and his voice lost its measure of confidence.

            My father didn’t seem interested in a geography lesson. He stood up. “Sebastian, won’t you join me for a second?” He asked formally.

            “Dad…” I tried to intervene but Sebastian squeezed my hand as he stood up.

            “Of course, sir.” He gave me a shaky smile and went to follow my father out of the ballroom.

            I locked eyes with Laurie who seemed just as concerned as I probably looked. When she saw I was looking at her, she tried to force a comforting smile.

            “Mom.” I looked over at her.

            “Sweetheart, I…” She sighed quietly. “Why don’t you girls finish dinner and go up to the bonfire they’re having by the lake?” She suggested in a timid voice. My mother was well spoken and let my father know if she didn’t agree with him. But if she did agree, she said nothing.

            She stood up and said nothing else.

            My heart raced and I panicked. “No…no…” I breathed and rushed out of the ballroom.

            “Charlie!” My sister followed me.

            I found my father talking to Sebastian outside of the hotel. They heard the doors open and they both turned.

            They went silent when they saw it was me.

            “Sebastian.” My voice cracked as I called out his name.

            He seemed to be breathing unevenly as if he were hiding something. His eyes flicked over to my father before he turned to walk away.

            “Sebastian, no.” I lunged forward to follow him but my father caught my arm.

            “Charlie, stop. You’re just a child, you need to forget this silly little game you’re playing.” He demanded.

            “It’s not a game!” I shouted. I didn’t care who heard. I was done with keeping my issues under wraps to save face. Everyone would hear. “I love him!”

            “You don’t know what love is!” My father snapped. “We’re leaving in the morning, go pack your things.”

            “I’m not going anywhere, you can’t do this!” 

I cried like an insolent child. I pulled away from him and ran to catch up with Sebastian.

            Night was falling and the path was lit up again. The air felt colder and I didn’t feel the lighthearted way I used to when it was just him and I.

            “Sebastian, please!” I begged as I caught up to him. I grabbed his hand and forced him to stop. “Don’t do this. We don’t have to listen to them. I don’t care what they say. I’ll leave it all behind, I’ll come live with you. I’ll work every day of the rest of my life as long as I’m next to you.” Tears streamed down my face as I anxiously rambled off everything that came to mind.

            His eyes were watering but he looked like he wanted to remain composed like the man he was supposed to be. “Charlotte…I can’t do that to you. This life isn’t what you want. I’m not what you want.”

            “You don’t know what I want.”

            “Please just listen.” He took my other hand in his. “Your family means more and so does your future. You need to listen to your parents and go home. You’re going to do great things and in a few months you’ll completely forget about me.” He forced a shaky smile. “And that’ll be for the best.”

            “You think I can just forget you? Forget all we had together? You’re delusional if you think I would forget all the times you told me you loved me or-or held me or kissed me or danced with me…Sebastian, I’ll never forget that.”

            “You’ll do so much better.” He touched my cheek and wiped away a few of my tears with his thumb. “You have the chance to leave everything in your life behind and make a name for yourself. That’s more than I’ll ever have. If you dropped that opportunity, I’d never forgive myself. So please, for my sake and for yours, go home.”

            “I-I can’t.” I sobbed. “I can’t leave you here.”

            “You can’t take me with you, it just doesn’t work like that. And I won’t let you stay here.” He pulled me close and kissed my forehead. “I loved you so much, you taught me so much about myself and life.”

            “Don’t say goodbye…” I begged. “Please, Sebastian.”

            “I won’t.” He swallowed and looked into my eyes. “I won’t say goodbye. Just know that I loved you so much.”

            “You still love me, say that you still love me.” I knotted my fingers in his hair and refused to let go.

            “I can’t, that’ll only make it harder.” He rested his hands on the back of my neck and rubbed his thumbs in small circles. “The summer had to end.”

           

            My sister held me close as we drove away. She could rest assured that she would see Chris again. My father liked him. But I would never see Sebastian again as long as he had his way.

            I cried into her shoulder and felt disgusted with myself that I hadn’t stood my ground.

 

 


	13. Ain't No Sunshine

_Ain't no sunshine when she's gone_  
_It's not warm when she's away_  
_Ain't no sunshine when she's gone_  
_And she's always gone too long_  
_Anytime she goes away_

 

             Sulking in the dead of August wasn’t fun. I didn’t want to leave my room for fear I would lose my cool if I saw my parents. But the only thing keeping me somewhat cool was a slow metal fan in the window. So I tried to move as little as possible. I laid on my bed in just a bra and shorts. My hair was pulled up and out of my face so it didn’t stick to the sweat on my forehead. My record player was sitting on the bed beside me. All my saddest albums were waiting to replace the one before it. The only movement I did was reaching up to lift up the needle and flip the record over to the next side.

            I wished it were winter so I could bundle up and hide under every blanket I owned.

            Every moment of that summer played back in my head. Every moment where things could’ve lasted if I hadn’t been so stupid. If I had been more careful, Michael never would’ve caught us. Then I wouldn’t have told Robert. So I wouldn’t have to tell my dad. And Sebastian wouldn’t have told me to go home.

            There was a soft knock at the door and my sister walked in. She was my only lifeline into the outside world. After all, we’d shared I felt I could trust her and her alone.

            “Hey…did you want anything to eat today?” She walked over and drew the blinds halfway so the sun wasn’t in my face. “We could go to the pool to cool off a little.”

            I just threw an arm over my face. “Laurie, it hurts so much.” I whimpered. I was done being cynical or angry. As much as I was both, I just wanted to be sad.

            I felt the dip in the mattress as she sat down next to my legs. She rested a hand on my knee and sighed. “Dad will come around.”

            “No, he won’t. Don’t lie to me.”

            “Okay…I don’t know if he will. But you’re an adult, Charlie. You can make your own choices now.”

            “Sebastian doesn’t want me anymore. He said it himself. He said my family was more important and that I shouldn’t leave for him.” I reminded her.

            She was quiet for a moment. “That’s hard…”

            “I’m just sorry I ruined your summer. Now you’re not even near Chris anymore.” I mumbled and I wasn’t lying. I genuinely felt bad that I had torn up everything for Laurie too.

            “You didn’t ruin my summer. Chris and I are still going to see each other. I was going to drive up there the end of this week….” Her voice faded.

            I sat up quickly. “You’re driving back to the resort?”

            She looked guilty. “Yes, but Charlie, I told mom and dad I wouldn’t take you and…”

            “Please, Laurie,” I begged and grabbed her arm. “I’ll tell them I went somewhere else just please help me sneak out.”

            She bit her lip and looked uneasy. “I don’t want them to worry…”

            “Either you take me or I’ll find another way.” I felt bad threatening her but I needed an out.

            “Okay fine.”

 

            That Friday, I was in Laurie’s car and my parents were none the wiser. After the third hour, my sister’s anxiety lessened and she calmed down a bit.

            “What are you going to say to him?” She asked.

            “What I feel.” I shrugged. “I know he’s worried about my future but is it crazy to think that he is my future? I gave him so much…”

            “Wait…” Laurie paused and her mind seemed to be going through a bunch of memories at a million miles a second. “Did you two…”

            I tensed up a little bit. “Did we what?”

            “Did you two have sex?”

            “What?”

            “All those times…oh, my God, I should’ve realized.”

            “I was going to tell you when we were older. Because it was the night you kissed Chris for the first time.”

            She scoffed. “Of course it was.”

            I couldn’t help but giggle and look over at her. Finally, she cracked a smile and rolled her eyes.

            “You’re lucky I love you and you’re my sister.”

            “I know.”

           

 

            It was going on six when we finally arrived at the resort. Laurie parked and I felt infinitely better in the cool mountain air. Knowing Sebastian was nearby was a comfort too.

            “Alright…Chris is working dinner, Sebastian might be playing. You need to stay out of sight if you see the Downeys.”

            I nodded and followed her towards the main hotel.

            It had only been a week since we’d left but it already felt strange being back in the ballroom. I heard piano music and instantly smiled. I glanced over at the stage but found Sebastian wasn’t sitting at the keys. It was another member of the band.

            “I’ll have Chris try to find him,” Laurie said. “Maybe he’s on a break.” She touched my shoulder and left to find Chris.

            I lingered around the crowds for a while until I caught sight of Susan. I quickly ducked out of the ballroom and walked down a hallway. That’s when I heard Sebastian’s voice.

            My heart leaped and I rushed to find him. When I did, I saw he was standing near a young woman. I recognized her vaguely as one of the girls who worked as a counselor for the kid’s camp.

            My footsteps stuttered and I noticed the smile on Sebastian’s face as he looked at her.

            He glanced over and his eyes widened. “Charlie?”

            Utterly betrayed, I turned and walked out of the hotel.

            That amazing connection was all in my head. I was just another toy for him, just like I had initially thought. I should’ve trusted my gut feeling before.

            I heard footsteps following me all the way to Sebastian’s cabin. But I never turned to look at him. I wasn’t even sure what was leading my direction. I wanted to leave but I couldn’t. I would always bounce back to the one thing I knew.

           

            “So what? You’re going to trash my place?” Sebastian finally spoke from behind me.

            “Why would I do that?”

            “Because you’re assuming that I moved on.”

            “Did you?”

            “I think that’s a stupid question.”

            “Don’t call me stupid.” I snapped and whipped around to face him. “I’m perfectly sane to think what I just saw. I was nothing but your plaything and good for you, you got a way out when I left.”

            “Charlotte, how many times do I have to tell you how I feel for you to believe me?” He demanded.

            “If you keep repeating yourself maybe you’ll believe it too!”

            “God for one fucking second could you act like I’m not some scumbag? We may be in different social classes but not everyone who doesn’t have money is despicable. In fact I’d reason to think that a lot more rich people are worse! Your father told me to go to hell and never look at you ever again. He acted like I was some criminal who screwed up his precious daughter!”

            It felt like the air was taken from my lungs. “Sebastian….”

            He didn’t let me finish my sentence. He grabbed my face and kissed me like a man whom only had seconds left to live. It reminded me how genuine he was.

            So I let him pick me up. I wrapped my arms and legs around him so we wouldn’t break the kiss. He pushed open the door and locked out the rest of the world.

           


	14. Stand By Me

            _If the sky that we look upon_

_Should tumble and fall_

_Or the mountains should crumble to the sea_

_I won’t cry, I won’t cry, no I won’t shed a tear_

_Just as long as you stand, stand by me_

 

            I didn’t want to wake up. I felt like if I woke up, I’d find myself back in my room at home. The fear of my imagination making up my night with Sebastian was too much to bear.

            “Charlotte.” His morning voice was so familiar to me. It was deeper and had a tinge of roughness to it. But he spoke my name with such love.

            I finally opened my eyes and began to cry when I saw his face. He was lying on the pillow beside me, his eyes on mine.

            He looked concerned and lifted a hand to my cheek to catch my sudden tears. “Hey, what’s wrong?” He asked gently.

            “I don’t want to go back.” I cried quietly. “No one understands me like you do. No one ever cared for me like you do.”

            “Laurie cares for you. Your parents care for you.” He told me. “They’re just looking out for your best interest.”

            “No, they’re trying to ruin my life.”

            “You know that’s not true.”

            “Sebastian, you have no idea how happy you make me. I don’t care where you came from or how much money you have. I just want to see you smile every day and tell me you love me every night.”

            He sighed deeply and kissed my forehead. “I want that too. And maybe we can have that in the future. But we need to be in a different place and a different time. I just don't know when that'll be yet. And we won't know until we're there.”

            “Please don’t…” I begged when I heard the finality in his voice. He was trying to end things again. 

            “But you need to keep moving. C’mon, be the strong woman I know you are.” He murmured encouragingly. "This isn't goodbye, it's 'see you later'. We'll find each other again, I promise." 

            I closed my eyes and felt an odd sense of peace overcome me. Maybe his words were finally kicking in. Or maybe I had come to terms with reality.

            “Okay.”

            “Okay.”

            “But let me have this morning.”

            “Deal.”

           

            As the sun crept up in the sky, Sebastian and I spent precious time together. We lay tangled up in the sheets and each other’s arms. We kissed like it was a necessity, we talked quietly about nothing in particular, and we made love one more time.

            It was going on eleven in the morning and I knew Laurie would be out looking for me soon. I lay sprawled against Sebastian’s chest as he played with my hair. I listened to his heartbeat as it counted down the few moments we had left. It was as if I was soaking up some of his warmth before I had to go face the cold world alone. I closed my eyes for a moment and just wanted to fall back asleep. But I couldn't. 

            “Promise me one more thing,” Sebastian spoke up.

            “Mhm.”

            “Don’t let others speak over you. You have a lot of important things to say and the world needs to hear them.”

            I propped my chin up to look at him. “You just think that because you love me.”

            “No, I think that because it’s true.” He replied firmly. “I know you’re going to accomplish big things but don’t let other people just set you aside. Nobody puts Charlie in the corner, okay?”

            I giggled and stretched up to kiss his shoulder then his jaw. “I love you,” I whispered.

            “I love you too.” He held my close to capture my lips one more time.

 

            I drove back home with Laurie. As we made our way down the mountain and the resort was out of sight, she glanced over at me.

            “Are you okay?” She asked softly.

            “Yeah, I think I will be,” I replied calmly.

            She smiled sadly and reached for my hand. “If you love someone let them go. If they come back then you know it’s meant to be.”

            I nodded. “I know, you’re right. I just hope we’ll be back together soon.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My lame attempt at "Nobody puts Baby in the corner." It was pretty anti-climatic. Kind of like seeing Dirty Dancing on stage and having to listen to a Non-Patrick Swayze butcher the line. And I have done that...twice. Anywho, next chapter is the epilogue and it'll be longer than this chapter.


	15. Chapter 15

_My lonely days are over and life is like a song_

_At last the skies above are blue_

 

_So darlin’ save the last dance for me._

 

            **Summer 1969**

 

            I wasn’t sure when I’d return to the Downey Resort, if ever. It certainly seemed to be an opportune time. I’d been in Nepal for a little over two years on my trip for the Peace Corps. Then I left again for Brazil, spending another two years. Now I was back in the states, ready to start a new chapter of my life.

            Problem was I wasn’t sure what that chapter would involve. I was fast approaching my twenty-fifth birthday and my mom was horrified that I wasn’t married and pregnant with my third child. I assured her there were more important things in life than settling down but that didn’t calm her.

            I hadn’t found anyone who made me feel the same way he did. For a year or two, I chalked it up the relationship to puppy love. That’s what my parents said. But over time I realized it was more. I had perhaps met my soulmate.

            We had kept in touch right up until I left for Nepal. I often missed him and kept a few Polaroid pictures of him with me as I traveled. But I was so busy there wasn’t a lot of time to brood on the relationship. 

 

            Now it was August and I was back in the Catskills. I drove up with my parents who I was living with until I found my own apartment. We were meeting our sister who was already there vacationing with her husband, Chris, and two children.

            They didn’t waste time. Right before I left for Nepal, Chris asked Laurie to marry him and they had a whirlwind of a wedding. Laurie refused to wait because she wanted me there as her maid of honor and did not want to wait two years for me to get back.

            They had a honeymoon baby, John Christopher Evans or Jack, and then Sandra Mae Evans came along. Now Laurie was pregnant again, this time with twins and I was at least happy to be able to be there for the birth this time.

            Even with kid three and four on the way, Laurie and Chris were still just as in love with each other as the day they met. And I was so happy for her. But I wondered if that could’ve been Sebastian and me.

 

            “Grammy!” Two little toddlers rushed up to us. My mom gasped and knelt down to scoop up her grandchildren.

            “Hi, my little ones.” She kissed their cheeks. Laurie and Chris had moved to Boston about a year after they married. Chris landed a well-paying job and Laurie was the housewife she always wanted to be. Fortunately, she listened to my rants about women’s rights and agreed whole-heartedly. But she was happiest at home with her children, which was fine by me.

            I smiled at my niece and nephew. I wasn’t the best with kids. I’d done a lot of work with children in orphanages during my time away. But I wasn’t confident with my ability as a nurturer. Chris and Laurie made it look so easy but I was sure if I babysat Jack and Sandra I’d make a mistake.

            But I was warming up to them, especially since the two toddlers refused to leave me alone.

            Laurie squealed and ran to hug me tightly. “I’m so glad you decided to come!”

            “Well, I couldn’t pass up the opportunity to walk down memory lane.” I forced a smile. In reality, the drive up the mountains had been tough. My mind couldn’t help but wander to the wild idea that Sebastian would be there. He wouldn’t be.

            Chris walked over and smiled. “It’s nice to see you, Charlie.”

            “You too. Excited for a fuller house?” I teased.

            “We’re ready. We just have to double everything and we should be all set.” Chris chuckled and wrapped an arm around Laurie.

            “Well, I’m happy for you both. I couldn’t imagine a more perfect family.”

            “You might be closer than you think, sis.” My sister replied cryptically.

            “What?”

            “Never mind.”

           

            I walked into the already crowded ballroom. Nothing had changed. I heard soft piano music and perked up. But when I looked over he wasn’t sitting at the bench. I sighed quietly and felt regret sinking in. I should’ve realized that I would be able to forget how much I missed Sebastian. There were reminders everywhere I turned.

            I bit my lip and turned to leave. I had lost my appetite and my nerve. I wanted to go back to 1963 when I knew where Sebastian was and where I could find him. He could’ve been anywhere in the world at that point. Just like every able-bodied American man, I was afraid he’d been drafted. But I didn’t even want to think about that possibility. The possibility that he could’ve died before I saw him again. My stomach churned and I desperately needed air.

           

            I walked back out into the night and stood near the croquet lawn, where we first formally met. The world had changed so much. John and Bobby had been assassinated, Dr. King was assassinated, Nixon was president, I wasn't sure when the Vietnam War would end, and man had landed on the moon. But you wouldn't know it standing on the quiet mountain. It was as if the resort was immune to the test of time. I desperately wanted to go back to 1963. Back then I knew where Sebastian was. I wanted to hear his voice again. 

            “Still bad at croquet?”

            My heart jumped and I turned quickly. “Sebs…” I whispered.

            He smiled and opened his arms. I wasted no time running right into his arms. I hugged him tightly and closed my eyes.

            “Oh my God, I didn’t know you’d be here,” I said breathlessly.

            “I didn’t know you would either.” He chuckled and held me closer. “Fuck, I missed you.”

            “You have no idea how much I’ve missed you.”

            He pulled back to look at me. He pushed a curl behind my ear and touched my cheek. “I forgot how beautiful you were.” He murmured.

             My chest tightened and I was in such disbelief. “How…why...what are you doing?” I rambled.

            “Chris asked me to come back for tonight. I wasn’t sure why but I guess he and Laurie…”

            “Were scheming, yeah that sounds like them.” I sighed.

            “I didn’t know you were back. I heard you left again. I was looking forward to getting back in touch with you but Chris said you were already on a plane.”

            I bit my lip. “I’m sorry, I was worried you didn’t want to hear from me.”

            “Charlotte, I never got over you.” He admitted. “There wasn’t a day I went without thinking about you.”

            I felt tears in my eyes. “Me too…I just thought it was too naïve to think we could ever end up together.”

            “Well…I did my best. I’m playing professionally now. Mackie’s managing everything for me. He’s really the reason I’m staying afloat.” He revealed.

            My eyes widened. “Really? Sebastian, that’s incredible.”

            He smiled shyly. “It wasn’t easy but I’m finally living the life I wanted to give you.”

            “Me?” I looked confused.

            “All my life, I wanted to have money but I figured I would still be okay if I never ended up rich. As long as I was happy it would be fine. Then I met you and I wanted to give you everything you possibly could want. You deserve so much, Charlotte.”

            “Sebastian…I don’t know what to say.”  I was completely at a loss for words. Everything inside of me was leaping for joy. It was all so overwhelming to process at once.

            He smiled and leaned in to kiss me. I eagerly reciprocated and wrapped my arms around him. I couldn’t believe I had forgotten how perfect it was to kiss him. It was like looking up to the sun during a nice spring day. It was soft, warm, and brought me so much happiness. I couldn’t hold him close enough.  

            “Say you’ll marry me.” He whispered when we drew apart.

            My thoughts screeched to a halt. “What?”

            “I don’t have a ring…and I haven’t really asked for your parents’ blessing but I couldn’t wait to ask.”

            “I uh…I don’t know if I’d be a good wife.” I laughed weakly.

            “It’s just a term, I don’t want to limit you. I just want to know that I’ll see your smile every day and tell you I love you every night. And if you still want that too then I want to marry you.”

            I couldn’t believe he had remembered what I said all those years ago before we parted ways. “That’s all I ever wanted.” I felt tears sting my eyes. “Yes, yes I’ll marry you.” I hugged him tightly and he lifted me off my feet. “Oh my God, my mom and Laurie are going to be so happy.”

            He chuckled but it faded. “What about your dad?” He set me back on my feet.

            “I think he’s too tired to care anymore,” I admitted and bit my lip. “My cousin was killed in Khe Sanh last year. It broke my aunt and uncle and I guess my dad realized if he had a son the same thing could’ve happened to him.” I explained. When I returned home, he told me the news in the airport. He held me close and wouldn’t let me go. I had never seen my father cry before. He apologized for pulling me away from Sebastian.

            “I’m so sorry…”

            I nodded and took his hands in mine. “I guess I should be glad you didn’t get drafted. Chris too.”

            “They almost did. But I told them I was an immigrant. Finally a legal citizen now.” He smiled slightly. "So I guess that's something else we can be happy about." 

            I smiled and hugged him again. “I love you,” I whispered.

            “I love you too.” He kissed the top of my head. “So…big wedding? Small wedding?”

            “Small.”

            “Honeymoon?”

            “Wherever is fine.”

            “Kids? No kids? Some kids? Lotsa kids?”

            “Maybe one or two. I don’t think I could handle the number of kids Laurie and Chris are planning for.”

            “They’re not stopping after the twins?” Sebastian asked with slight horror in his voice.

            “I doubt it. Laurie wants a litter and a half.”

            He chuckled and sighed. “I’d be content with one or two.”

            “Mhm…” I rested my head on his chest and listened to his heartbeat. It was like I was restarting our time together. “I don’t want to leave you again.”

            “Then don’t.”

            “I won’t. I couldn’t bear it.” I smiled up at him. “Think we could still do that lift?”

            “Uh…maybe? I’m not sure.”

            I reached down to take off my heels. “Let’s do it.”

            “It would be easier to start in the lake again.” He reminded me but proceeded to take off his sport coat.

            “Ready?” I asked and hiked up the skirt of my dress a little to get a good running start.

            “Go for it.”

            I hoped for the best and jumped into his arms. He held me over his head for about a second before I lurched backward and screeched. Sebastian did his best to catch me as we tumbled into the grass. It wasn’t a bad fall so we both erupted into laughter.

            “Okay, so that’s a no.”

            “I guess we’re just too old now. Unless we practiced some more.”

            “Oh well.” I grabbed his hand as he helped me stand up. "I still think we can dance together though." I reminded him. 

           "You have no idea how long I've waited to dance with you." 

           "Well, I haven't danced with anyone else," I said as he pulled me close. We swayed softly to the faint music from inside the ballroom. I couldn't have been happier than I was in that moment. 

            “Tell me about your trip,” Sebastian spoke up. “I want to hear all about it.”

            “Well, I started in Nepal and then Brazil. It was amazing…I learned so much. You should’ve met one of the translators he was so funny. He didn’t get a lot of my jokes or sayings. There was this girl from California there too she told the best stories about the actors she had run into…”

 

I could've talked to him for hours under those stars. We had all the time left in the world to talk though. We could talk at our wedding, we could talk on our honeymoon, we could talk through my pregnancy, we could talk to our son, we could talk during our anniversaries. But talk was cheap. I just wanted to dance with him. That's all I ever wanted.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That's the epilogue. Thanks to everyone who read through or just skimmed. I appreciate it!


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